The House of Sorrows

Chapter 32: "Obvious"

"Obviously it affected her Lockwood! You died, when I got out there you were barely conscious while she was holding your limp, bloody body! She had almost constant nightmares for the first two weeks. At one point she didn't sleep for days, she didn't eat, or move. Her grief was debilitating Lockwood. And no offense but you've been very ignorant to her feelings on the subject." George conveyed with anger and frustration at Lockwood's carelessness.

Lockwood stood there for a moment contemplating what George had said. He felt a rush of guilt flood his body. He's been so stupid when it came to everyone's feelings. Though at the time I was asleep again and blissfully unaware that this conversation was going on. Lockwood apologized sincerely to George, because just then he'd realized that George must've had dealt with his grief as well.

"I'm so sorry, I—I didn't...I don't know why I was being so abrasive about it. I guess I didn't know how to broach the subject so I just ignored it." Lockwood said with a regretful tone.

George thanked him for the apology before telling him that he has more apologies to say, first and foremost, me. Then Holly, Flo, even Kipps. He sort of skulked his way up the stairs and back to my room, George followed behind him. As they made their way to my room they didn't realize I was dead asleep. When they reached my door they knocked lightly, I didn't hear it so Lockwood quietly walked in. He saw me in my light blue pajama shorts, and a black sports bra, lying flat on my stomach. My head was resting on my pillow, my body language was relaxed, calm, at peace. Lockwood walked over to my bed and leaned down, and brushed a piece of hair out of my face. I felt the light touch and shifted in my sleep, Lockwood's hand shot back. George stood at the door, watching this heartfelt yet incredibly awkward scene unfold.

"For the love of god just wake her up!" George whisper shouted at Lockwood.

"Shhh!" Lockwood shushed George before quietly saying my name in a futile attempt to wake me up.

"Hmmmm." I groaned as I readjusted my position in my bed.

I was now facing Lockwood, only inches from his face. He was looking at how peaceful I looked, my lips slightly parted, my eyelashes resting on my cheek. I was no longer the scared girl he saw only 20 minutes ago when I was in the throes of a vicious nightmare.

"Lucy? Come one wake up, I've got to talk to you." Lockwood voiced in a sing-songy manner, I heard him that time and slowly opened my eyes.

I jumped back when I realized just how close to my face he was, it startled me to say the least.

"Oh. Hi Lockwood, and George...why exactly are you in my room?" I questioned them both, my awareness of my shorts and sports bra made me severely uncomfortable and awkward.

It felt like a portal to my soul was opened and they could see every thought and feeling plastered across my face. I sat up with my legs crisscrossed, my arms covering my stomach in a desperate attempt to cover myself. Lockwood noticed my hesitation and blushed a bright red color across his cheeks. I must've blushed as well because Lockwood looked down at the ground. There was an awkward silence that haunted us for a few seconds before George butted in.

"So Lockwood has something to say. So say it." George blurted out in to silence.

"Yeah. So uh, I wanted to say I'm sorry. About everything, it was necessary but I didn't need to be so ignorant and stupid about the whole thing. I'm sorry, truly." He finished with a charming Lockwood smile, the kind that I had so missed these past months.

"Thanks, really. that means a lot." I smiled back hoping that it would show full forgiveness, though part of me was still angry.

I'd lost myself those first few weeks, I didn't eat, sleep, move, I was a broken shell of who I was. I suffered, I pushed away everyone, George, Holly, Kipps, Flo, even Barnes. The days melted together, one after another, even the skull didn't dare make a snarky quip or insult, and that was something quite rare for him. Nevertheless I was now sitting right in front of Lockwood, and though I really did appreciate his apology, I didn't know if I was ready to fully forgive him yet. At least not on the inside. So I put up a facade, a smile, a laugh, and performance no one could doubt. I have to admit I was damn good at it too, I even convinced myself at times, that I was the same girl that I was before he'd "died". But I wasn't, I didn't know if I would ever be that girl again. No matter how much I wished for it.

Authors Note: Oh boy. You have no idea what's to come, and honestly I'm reveling in that feeling of power! Yay! Hehehe!