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Ryan hated the stigma around feelings. That same stigma was the thing that was keeping her up at night, after the kiss herself and Ricky went to bed, yet neither of them knew how to act. The awkwardness filled the room as they both faced opposite sides of the room both moving closer to each other until they eventually turned around. Her head found itself on his chest and his hand on her waist until she heard soft snoozes come from the young boy.
As she listened to his deep breaths she focused on the secure arm around her and question what she had done. She didn't regret the kiss or the feelings she was currently feeling but she didn't want anything to change. The idea of a relationship was comforting to her, having her own person, it's the principle that freaked her out, the relationships all around her taught her silently that it honestly wasn't worth it, and she knew what Ricky was thinking, he was already thinking of it, a relationship between the both of them.
Her overthinking led to her coming up with a song idea, she quietly moved off the bed and towards her keyboard, plugging her headphones to the device with a notepad besides her. She quickly came up with a melody whilst glancing over the boy that lay on her bed comfortably, lyrics about the perfect boy filled her mind and before she knew it she had a verse and a slight chorus about all she wanted from a guy. And suddenly the sleep deprivation consumed her as she felt her eyes grow heavy, making her way back to her bed she positioned herself hugging Ricky's back causing the boy to automatically turn and hug her back, their legs tangling, a smile fought its way onto Ryan's face.
As Ryan's eyes closed and she began to fall into a slumber, she felt the boy press a kiss onto her forehead.
--
Ricky, still in his pjs decided it was time to go home to at least shower and where clothes that weren't from midddle school, so with the company of his bestfriend, Ryan and Ricky walked into the Bowen household to find the elder Bowen sprawled across the sofa.
"Now this is shameful", the girl automatically scrunched up her nose at the smell, causing Ricky to giggle at his best friend, the lounge looked like a basement turned into a bedroom and the smell consisted of two week old wings and funky milk.
"It smells like my bedroom in here"
"Even more shameful", the girl dropped her bag on the floor and made her way to the windows to open the curtains, she quietly picked up food rubbish whilst Ricky attempted to cheer up his dad, Ryan didn't mind the mess she understood that the family was going through a rough time like her and her sister did a while back and she never forgot the countless check ins Mr Bowen did making sure the girl attended school and that Sacha didn't loose her job.
As she picked up empty bottles and sprayed some febreze she listened in on the conversation of the Bowen with a smile on her face, she giggled at the mans grumpiness until the dance came up.
During school, Ricky and Big Red begged her to come with them to homecoming after many eye rolls later the trio finally agreed to going together for old times sake. Ryan didn't mind it as Bell had already been asked by a cute girl from theatre club, this way she could keep watch of her friend whilst also enjoying herself.
