Going Nowhere ➳ C.C/L.J

nineteen

The girls have left me by myself with the occasional return of a maid because they have to do a week of interviews. Luckily, my arms are becoming more usable each and every day. Plus, I'm starting to remember more and more even though there's a lot of fuzzy moments.

Before they left, Lauren has been pouting around the house because Camila and I have been avoiding her. Well, more Camila than I. I would've never thought that she'd finally stand up for herself. For us. I'm glad she did.

I was laying on my futon, staring at the ceiling when the door opened. My head shot up, looking at the figure in the doorway, making my nervousness subside.

I've begun to get so paranoid learning about the death my mother. I'm guessing that's what the girls were trying to avoid by keeping this to themselves.

"Lauren, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in Chicago or Seattle? Somewhere that's not here." I asked pulling my cover over my upper torso.

I scanned her face to see her
puffy red eyes and smeared makeup. She sniffled before replying, "I need to talk to
you."

"Well, talk."

She sighed out after a long pause while clutching the doorknob, "Please, please give me another chance."

"Lauren, begging is not pretty on you."

Her eyes got softer, "That's all I know to do. And you and Camila are all I know. I've fucked up so much and I'm sorry about that. Okay? I'm trying."

I sat up and crossed my legs feeling multiple emotions pile up inside of me, "I may not remember a lot, Lauren, but I do remember telling you to get help and stop doing this to us. You even hurt Camila when I was in a coma. How fucked up can you get?"

Lauren sat down on the end of the futon, "Who told you about that?" Her voice was stern.

"No one had to tell me, Lauren. Things don't stay a secret for long." I was referring to something over her head.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She now sounded much more confused than before.

I did my best to turn my body and get up. Lauren tried to help but I scooted away. I don't want her help.

As I got up to walk to the desk, I spoke with conviction, "Lauren, do you really really really want me back?"

"Yes."

"Tell me the truth." I opened the desk drawer and grabbed the papers. "Why didn't you tell me about my Mom's death and my father's homicides?"

Lauren shot up and grabbed the pages from me, "Where did you get these?!"

"Oh and while you're answering those questions, You can explain to me why you and Camila got 50k to take care of me. What the fuck?! I thought I was your girlfriend, not an incentive for money." I was angry.

Lauren stuffed the papers in her back pocket, "You really didn't need to know about this."

"Tell me or you will never get me back."

Lauren sighed out and pushed her hair out of her face. She sat me down in the leather chair then knelt down in front of me with her hands on my knees, "Baby, I really don't think you need to know about this."

"I won't say it again, Lauren. Talk." I was no longer letting her control me.

"Camila and I didn't get the money. We just signed the papers. That money was put into an account for you. We signed to keep you in our lives. We love you. You were never supposed to find out about that."