Facetime Calls~ jschlatt

~chapter 21~

Ted let me sleep in his bed while he slept on the floor. I couldn't sleep, so much was playing on my mind.

I decided to go and get a drink of water from the kitchen. I stepped over Ted carefully to try not to wake him and opened the door quietly.

As I was walking into the kitchen, I heard a noise. It was schlatt...

He sat at the kitchen unit, and he stared at me as he sipped on some type of alcohol. I knew it was alcohol, I could practically smell it from here.

"do you have a fucking problem with your eyes?" I snapped not in the mood as it was 2 am.

"not with my eyes" his eyes lowered as he stared at the liquid in his cup.

"really, I'm shocked because you won't stop staring at me" I said as I full a glass full of water and took a drink.

"i'm scared" he said still looking down.

"What?"

"i'm afraid that i'll get hurt again," he spoke sadly, finally looking up to me.

"What do you mean?" i asked him.

"i'm afraid of relationships, being in one scares me. You know, last time.." he mumbled.

"schlatt?"

"uh huh" he said his voice cracking.

"Why are you telling me this?"

"because I like you, Nora." he looked to me again and then got up for the kitchen chair and walked up to me and inched his face closer.

"Look, you make me happy but scared at the same time, and I think that's love. I don't know because ever since i left her, I haven't felt that . I haven't felt a thing like that until you showed up on that stupid love or host. So i distanced myself from you and acted like a total dick and it's because i like you Nora. "

I was completely shocked. There is no fucking way schlatt just confessed his undying love for me, after everything he's done.

"so you humiliated and bullied me in front of 70 thousand people because you liked me? you realize people made fun of me for weeks?"

"I know you'll never forgive me, but I want to apologize, and I don't do that often,"

"I'd like to fucking think you'd apologize. Every little word you've said has damaged me even more to the part where if i even think about it, I can't think straight, schlatt. Do you have any idea what you did?"

"I know you hate me, but listen -"

"That's the thing I thought I did, but I liked you, schlatt."

"You liked me?" He said stunned.

"I don't know, you confuse me,"

he looked hurt by this he inched his face closer and put his hand on top of mine, which was gripping onto the surface of the unit behind me. I had nowhere to go.

"I don't want to do that."

"If you don't want to hurt me, I'm afraid it's too late for that" I let the tears fall. Finally.

He put his thumb under my eye and gently wiped the tears away and almost looked lovingly into my eyes.

"Well it's your fault so.." I said looking down just before he got to close.

he let go of my face and inched back.

"I'm sorry" he said.

And he walked away.

A/N

I felt like crying writing this because I know how hard it is to deal with having philophobia.

It's very hard to deal with, and it doesn't really make things easy in life for me, but I thought that writing about it would help me so ta daaa here we are! thank you for reading don't forget to vote :)

if you see any words spelt wrong or have any typos don't be afraid to tell me :)

~ clover