In your arms (Tayvin)

One Match.

There will be parts 3 & 4 for Telling the world, but I wanted to write this, to celebrate Tayvin day yesterday!

"I might only have one  match. But I can make an explosion"

Fight Song.

I had spent an evening after the show last week with a load of country artists who happened to be in the area; Kelsei ballerini, Little Big Town and Rachel Plattern, and we'd had a ball, passing my guitar back and forth, having a good old jam session. I'd made some cookies that morning which went down a treat.

We'd taken loads of video clips for the fans, mostly of myself being an embaresing dork dancing and singing along to all the songs, often with the wrong lyrics.

Just before they'd left the girls had taken a photo in the "Fight Song" pose from Rachels single.

I loved that song. It really about standing up for your self, standing with your beliefs and proving you weren't giving up. I wish i'd wrote it! It really symbolised this era for me. 1989 was my fight song. I was taking back my life, proving I'm alright, being strong, doing what i wanted, still believing in my beliefs and proving I've got a lot of fight left in me.

And it had paid off. I'd taken back my life from the media. It was in my hands again. I was a small boat on the ocean sending big waves into motion. Everyone was suddenly back on my side, causing my sucess to be even bigger than before. All those things i didnt say, the wrecking balls inside my brain, I screamed them load during this era, as my voice was being heard. Feminism. Happiness. The importance of not needing a man to be happy. Respect from the Media. Girls supporting girls. I'd screamed it all. And people listened.

And because of that, i got named the 6th of the Forbes influential leaders of the world list. I loved this era. So much. I was so happy, and then after all i'd been saying about there not being anyone who would want to date me knowing the package deal i came with, I met Calvin.

He just complemented my life in a way i never knew i needed. I didnt need him there, but i wanted him there. He took my walls down fast, and he believed in me. Behind closed doors he was Adam, and i was simply Taylor. Neither of us were world wide superstars behind doors, we were just a normal couple. He treated me like i was normal too, and so we were already so comfortable around each other. It was different this time than it ever had been before. I felt safe; protected from the media, as not only were most of them on my side, but i had calvin, who kept me safe. I know i said that anyone i ever held hands with in public from now on would have to have to be amazing to get me to let go of my fears. But Calvin hadn't done that. He hadnt wooed me with gifts, or serondaded me with love songs. He hadn't tried to seduce me, or made a big speech. He'd said one word. Its amazing how a single word can make a heart open again. The word is now ours. It belongs to us. It would loose its significance each time we told someone, so right now, it was just ours. This was our love story. Maybe one day i'd tell the public what finally made me change my mind, probably by a song, but right now, this love story was ours.

All of this ran through my mind as i was at Calvin's house in LA, sunbathing next to him. We both had one earphone in and we were listening to my phone's music on shuffle. I closed my eyes again, and then heard 'Fight Song' begin to play, making me smile. i began to sing along, taking the headphones out, so it was playing outloud and soon Calvin joined me, and so i pulled him up of the ground and we began to awkwardly dance about together.

I was amazed at how relaxed he was around me. I bought out a side of him that even I'd only seen for the past few weeks, and he bought out the very best in me. The song finished, and we collapsed back onto the outside couch. Out of the corner of my eye i saw Calvins Inflatable collection huddled by the edge of his pool, and it was then i remembered i'd got him a gift.

"I've got a present for you Cal" I whispered in his ear, and being the 4 year old he was, his face lit up, and he grinned at me.

"What are you waiting for?!" He exclaimed! "Go and get it!"

I quickly skipped inside, and ran back out with the square box, carefully handing it to him.

"This is for being amazingly perfect and because i saw this and thought of you" i said giggling. Calvin ripped of the wrapping paper, before looking at me and smiling. He pulled me in for a hug.

"Thanks Babe! I love it!" he said, It was an inflatable swan to add to his collection.

"I was thinking we could get it out now?" I said grinning back.

He nodded, before running to get the pump. I opened the box, and unwrapped the plastic. Before too long, there stood a massive swan before us.

"I didn't know it was this big" i said laughing!

"Its so magnificent!" Calvin exclaimed, wrapping his arms around my front as he stood behind me. "Its like the swan of all swans".

"Swan Goals." i whispered back, causing him to giggle. He'd seen all the tumblr posts, and how my fans made everything about me goals! Relationship goals, best friend goals, cat goals, boyfriend goals etc etc.

We lifted it over to the pool and i climbed on to it, and then Calvin climbed in front of me, almost pushing me in, so i wrapped my arm around his neck, clinging on. Soon enough we were floating around on the swan.

I called my security over, who were sat in the corner with a cup of coffee, only there because i needed a driver to get to mine later!

"Any chance you could take a picture Steve?"

"Of course" He replied, used to it by now. I pointed my phone out which was on the floor still, and me and Calvin posed whilst he took an picture.

After a while i realised i had to head off soon, so we climbed out, and Calvin gabbed me a towel. I sat back down on the sofa, pulling up my photos. I opened the photo that Steve had took, and grinned, immediately knowing what i had to do.

"We might only have one match, but we can make an explosion" I whispered to Calvin who had come over and sat next to me to see the picture.

"You're serious?" Calvin said looking at me. He had been wanting me to post a picture of us together for weeks, and i almost had on monday, but settled for the blurry one, of him but not me. It would be the first official Tayvin photo, and it would make the fans, especially the tumblr fans explode.

I nodded, and brought up Instagram.

I thought for a moment about the tag, before posting it. Calvins phone lit up beside him, and he picked it up and opened instagram. He smiled noticing the tag. He knew what i meant with Swan Goals.

He leant over and kissed me, and i smiled againt him, knowing full well the explosion we'd just caused on the internet.

"Maybe Swan Goals will be our Always?" I said grinning. He rolled his eyes at my nerdy quote, before pulling me in for another kiss.

My life wasn't perfect, some members of the media were still against me. But right now, that didnt matter.

I still had a lot of fight left in me.