When 00:00 Strikes || heehoon (English Ver.)

Where up is down and down is up

Sunghoonʼs POV

I sighed stressed and threw myself on my bed. Whenever I was in the presence of Heeseung I could not keep self control. What was wrong with me? I always treated him so badly, but I couldn't help it. I couldn't accept how unfair that incident was six years ago, so my temper got worse.

From that day on, my life just got more eventful. Too many things happened, I didn't have time to digest them and, often, they were kinda bad. The argument with Jake and the subsequent breakup with him was like rubbing salt into a wound. Yet I had to convince myself to let him go, we couldn't go on like this.

The last few times we'd been seeing each other before we separated ways, he'd started losing weight, smoking and not telling me everything he did, like why he was absent from school for long periods of time or not come home at night. I was there for him when his parents were killed, so I don't understand why he became like that. He didn't even tell me if they found out about his parents' murder. He just disappeared from my life as fast as he came into it.

This tore me apart at first. Then I repeated myself it was a relief and, slowly, I felt better. So we come to the unexpected news that I would have a stepbrother. I wasn't sure whether to be happy or not, I didn't feel ready yet, but everything was already decided. Even if for now Heeseung disturbs my stillness, the idea of having a brother sweeps away some of my loneliness. I'll have to get used to him.

I got out of bed and placed some objects on the desk. As I closed a notebook, something quite small moved. I looked more closely and noticed that it was a piece of ash from a cigarette. How the fuck did it get there? Anyway, I didn't think much about it. I went out and stopped in front of Heeseung's room. There was a very powerful thunder that made the windows vibrate and, then, it started pouring.

Behind the door was the sound of someone sniffing up. Was Heeseung crying? Was I too hard on him? I decided to enter, and it was easy because the door was not locked. Once inside, I locked it behind me, trying to be as quiet as possible.

The light of the continuous lightning was reflected in the white walls of his room creating brightness and this allowed me to see a lil better. I stood there for an indefinite time, without moving or thinking anything, just gazing at him silently.

Heeseung did not seem to have a calm sleep. The thunder grew stronger and deeper. In addition to the fact that he had probably just finished crying - or perhaps he was still - he was tossing and turning in bed and wincing at every thunder.

I tried to walk slowly towards him, having no idea what I was doing. My feet were going on their own. I sat at the edge of his bed and stood still. Suddenly a blinding lightning fell somewhere nearby and was followed by a violent thunder. Suddenly, Heeseung sat down panting heavily. I wasn't moving, so he didn't notice I was standing right next to him.

I glanced at the digital alarm clock on the bedside table, it was 00:00. Shortly after, between a thunder and an other, a shot was heard. My heart started beating faster, Heeseung began to shake slightly. Four seconds passed and there was another one. Yes, I heard correctly. Heeseung turned to me, which took him by surprise as he was unaware of my presence.

«Sunghoon! What are you doing here?»

«Sorry, I'm leaving now»

«No! Please don't do it»

I was about to get up but he firmly grabbed my wrist to stop, so I was sitting again.

«Oh ok, as you want»

«Sunghoon, don't go, don't leave me alone, I beg you»

«I'm not going anywhere Heeseung, I'm not leaving you, I'm here»

But did I really say those words? I don't believe it, being with him changes me completely. He immediately threw his arms around me and hid his head in the crook of my neck. I didn't expect that. I wasn't used to this feeling anymore, I couldn't remember how it felt. And now those memories of moments like this with Jake were resurfacing, causing me pain.

At first I hesitated, but then I decided to hug him to find some comfort in turn.

«I'm scared, Sunghoon»

«Me too, but don't worry, Heeseung, it's just a storm» I said it mostly to convince myself it was really just that. Although, unfortunately, it was the exact opposite of what I was hoping had happened.

However, the thunder faded, indicating that the storm was receding. Heeseung and I were still hugging as before, he wasn't going to let go. Gradually, he began to move until he lay down without parting. Panic. He had already fallen asleep. Part of me wanted to go back to my room, but I would have woken him up. All I could do was relax my muscles and, eventually, sleep peacefully.