Anyone But You [PhayuRain] [Love In The Air]

11: BREAK MY DOR

~ 9 YEARS AGO

The three weeks before Graduation had been torture for Phayu, knowing what he had to do, wanting nothing more than to be with Rain, to be happy with him, to make him happy. 

It was unbearable to see the joy lighting up Rain's face when he looked at him, to be the recipient of his uninhibited kisses and touches drenched in affection and adoration, knowing what was coming.

He wasn't sure whether Rain noticed that every time they spent the night together now, that they made love face-to-face. 

In the past, they were wild and no-holds-barred. Every position and angle had been blissfully tried, more than once. But now, he couldn't bear to not see his face when he was inside him, to not feel his arms or legs twined around him, to not have his heart beating against his.

He needed to see every expression on Rain's face, craved it. Every time he bit his lip in pleasure, every time his eyes shut tight overwhelmed with sensation, every time his mouth opened on a rush of air, a sigh or a groan.

Phayu hoarded every kiss, every touch, every look like a homeless person squirreling away cents and bites of food. He did his best to sear it all into his memory.

Rain was usually the one snapping selfies of them, of him, but now he was the one doing it, trying to be discrete. He even secretly took pictures of Rain while he was sleeping and felt like a total creeper. But he couldn't help himself. Each of those nights, he stayed up as long as he could watching him snore softly, the moon filtering through the curtains the only witness to his apology. I'm so sorry. 

He knew that Rain noticed the change, the moodiness, the desperation, even though he was distracted studying for finals and trying to get his year-end projects done.

He even asked about it, but Phayu chalked it up to the stress of his final year, graduating, and the thought of starting his responsibilities as heir/CEO-in-training. 

Rain was nothing but understanding and supportive, giving him the space that he needed to adjust. Phayu knew Rain expected that things would be easier after Graduation when they could start the next phase of their lives together.

He wanted to both drag this out as long as possible and get it over with immediately - knowing that both options were cruel.

It was the end of the semester, the end of Rain's critical 4th year where he needed to maintain his strong grades to meet the conditions of the internship that he had been selected for, so Phayu didn't want to do anything to compromise that. 

Or so he told himself as he dragged out the end for as long as possible.

He hardly slept knowing that Rain was going to be blindsided. He didn't even want to think about how he was going to survive his life without Rain. It was an unbearable thought.

*

Finally, it was the day of Rain's last exam.

Rain had excitedly made plans for them to go out to lunch when he was done to celebrate. Phayu had nodded vaguely, neither confirming nor denying the plans.

So it was almost 2 PM and he was parked at the entry to the Architecture building waiting for Rain as he had done so many times over the past few months. Rain's last class and final for the year would be wrapping up any minute now.

He knew that in a few minutes, Rain would fly through those doors with zero inhibition, not caring what anyone thought as he joyously threw himself into his arms.