TOXIC DATE

SHOCK

"I don't care if you are infertile, Do I want to raise my own children? Yes, of course. But if that can't happen than FUCK it it's not gonna happen. I'm still going to love you with all my heart and soul. I will never leave you for that. We can adopt or only have dogs I don't give a fuck I just want to be with you that's my ultimate goal. Do you get it"

IRA'S POV

"Infertile, how can I be infertile?"

This was the most pathetic and terrific shock in my whole life which I received today.

"I can never become a mother, a woman is said to be complete when she grows and matures as a mother, when she gets those experiences of carrying a life inside her. But in my case I didn't even get this share of my happiness. I am not capable of even carrying my own child..then how can I be good for you, or anyone"

"Ira our life doesn't depend on kids" He was trying to calm me with the best things he could say.

"No Asher, if I am infertile. I am not someone whom you deserve, I have been cursed since the beginning and see where the end is taking us....Asher, I am not at all good...I ain't fine...I can't be a mother....you can't be a father.....Asher......!!" And I was weeping like hell.

"I don't care if you are infertile, Do I want to raise my own children? Yes, of course. But if that can't happen than FUCK it it's not gonna happen. I'm still going to love you with all my heart and soul. I will never leave you for that. We can adopt or only have dogs I don't give a fuck I just want to be with you that's my ultimate goal. Do you get it" Asher seemed serious now.

But how can I make this heart of mine understand. What is a marriage when it has to be child less. What have I even done this bad that I can't have the happiness of having my own child. It feels as if a long wished dream, broke and shattered into pieces while I couldn't spare to even save a single part of it. Bad childhood, ruined school experience, fatherless daughter, orphan after my amma's death, a husband whose love I received after so many trials and tribulations...and now ..?

Where was my life leading me to? I can only feel a pit of darkness and dampness. It feels as if something inside has pierced my heart and there is no way to cure this ache and pain. Life is never perfect we all have a story, ugly..beautiful..sad..bad...with happiness just adding like a cherry on top. Who doesn't want to have those perfect endings? But how many of us actually get it is just a question..maybe a handful or even less than that.

I want happiness, after all the misfortunes I bore. But what am I even getting now. A news..a shock...for life that I can't have my baby. This world doesn't even consider someone a complete woman without a child. But was I really incomplete. Isn't Asher enough for me. Yes! He is more than enough for me. But not for this world in which we all are living. And when has not this world questioned any of us. Yes! It has and most of the time the women were liable to prove and give answers.

My life is getting into pits of darkness and I feel everything is blurred. I can't hear anything anymore, is it the effect of the sedatives or of the mental trauma. That now all I want is peace and nothing more than that.

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ASHER'S POV

Having a kid and not having one isn't something I am bothered about. Then why is she so bothered? Ira without a kid or with a kid is still Ira to me. The equation we share won't change anyhow.

"Waah bhaiya, ab ye mohtarma humare vansh ko chashmo chirag se bhi door rakhengi"
(Wow brother, now this lady will keep our descendants away from us)

"Shut up aapa for God's sake, have you even seen her condition or are you just blabbering any shit coming out from your mouth" I just was so frustrated currently to even notice who was standing in front of me.