The new year couldn't have started out worse. Everyone at my department, except for those who were on vacation, returned to work on January 2nd. I was in my office doing a ton of paperwork when Dinah knocked and entered.
"Do you have a minute to talk?" she asked.
"Not really, but go ahead."
"I normally wouldn't both you right now, but this is kind of an emergency," she explained.
"What's going on?" I inquired.
"What's going on between you and Lauren?" she questioned.
"Um, what are you trying to get at?" I wasn't sure where she was headed with this.
She sighed, "Camila came to my house last night hysterical. She claimed that Lauren was having an affair with you."
"What?" I cried. "That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard."
"I know," agreed Dinah. "That's what I told her. I told her that I'm pretty sure you're straight, but she said Lauren is not like other women. Okay, she might be a little butch, but I'm sure that's not enough to turn you gay."
"I am strictly dickly," I declared.
"Exactly!" Dinah added. "Lauren might have that masculine swagger, but it doesn't change the fact that she has a vagina. Well, I'm glad we got that cleared up."
"Yes, now let me get back to my work," I snarked.
Dinah stuck her tongue out at me and left my office.
Not even 10 minutes later, I got a call from the front desk. What the fuck is it now? "Hello?"
"Hi, Ms. Hamilton. I have a Mrs. Cruz here at the front desk wanting to speak to you about her case. She says it's urgent."
I've dealt with a few families with the name Cruz, so I didn't know exactly who she was. Whatever. "Send her up."
Approximately three minutes later, to my surprise, Skeletor appeared in my office. "Camila, what are you doing here?"
"I know you're sleeping with Lauren," she announced. I rolled my eyes, but she continued. "Just remember that if she's willing to cheat with you, then she'll be willing to cheat on you. However, I don't think you two will get that far. This, right here, is temporary. Lauren and I are life partners. You're just some fling. I'll be damned if I let some homewrecker tear down what we've spent 10 years building up. Don't get too comfortable you fucking whore."
Camila was on her way out when I stopped her in her tracks. "How do I taste?"
"What?" She turned around and gave me a perplexed look.
"I wanna know how I taste to you. I know you two haven't been having much sex lately, but I know you occasionally still do. Lauren is all up in this p-ssy almost every single day. Just remember that the next time you kiss her or suck her d-ck."
I could see veins bulging in Camila's forehead. She walked slowly up to my desk. Without warning, she spit right in my face. I wanted to kick her ass so bad, but I didn't want to risk losing my job. "Leave before I call security," I warned her. Fortunately, she left without any additional trouble. I pulled a sanitizer wipe out of my drawer and cleaned my face.
Miami Dade College was still on winter break, so I went straight home after work. I wasn't expecting Lauren to come by, but she knocked around 7 pm. When I let her in, she looked really flustered.
She exhaled a long breath, "How do I tell you this?"
"How do you tell me what?"
"We can't see each other anymore."
