You can change me

Prologue

I am different.

I've always been.
Even my friends told me I'm boring and activities without me are more fun.

Who can blame them? They're right and i have to admit it.

I am boring.

I've never been in a relationship if we don't include the nerdy kid obsessed with rockets i gave attention to and agreed to marry him on the climbing frame in first grade. Everyone around me has already had at least two boyfriends and their first kiss, most of them even before they attended middle school. Listening to their stories and hook-ups at party's is boring because i simply can't tell any interesting thing about my lovelife.

To put it briefly; i can only dream about romances in any way, the closest I got to kissing was probably reading a soft small village romance in Ireland, full with flowers and gentle touching.

That was when i was 16 and i remember feeling uncomfortable and blushing reading the paragraphs when they finally decided to do what every couple does at some point.

My name is Madeleine Laura Hayes and I'm 19 years old. A pretty basic name for a basic person.

In my Highschool, I've always been called names and they gossiped and giggled 'prudish' when i refused to do some things they would've definitely done without hesitating, but i wasn't like that.

My hobbies were the most basic ones ever, reading, watching netflix and my cat, Smilla.
Sometimes i took photos of flowers and plants with my phone and posted them on Instagram. Not necessary to say that the only likes came from my sister and parents.

I remember my first party and it was awful. Janet, a friend of mine, invited me to her 18th birthday and she planned a huge party, her goal was to throw the biggest party of the whole school and what can i say, she did.

When i arrived i could barely recognize her house, i was blinded by flashing party lights, loud music through the speakers and a crazy amount of people. As i said, the whole school attended her party.

I had a struggle to find her and when i managed to do it after an eternity, she was already drunk, sitting on the most popular boy's lab and making out. I immediately averted my gaze and as i did i noticed that everyone at the party was drunk and kissing people just as hungry and wild predators.

I felt uncomfortable and wanted to leave, but it was so crowded that i needed another hour to manage to leave the party, call a taxi and drive home. My friends later blamed me for being such a party pooper and that i need to become cooler and more chill.

Now, when i look back, i totally agree. I'm boring, annoying, a fool and afraid of any kind of intimacy. But I want to change that.

I'm going to go to my dream college in 3 days, this is my chance to change everything about myself and become a cool and popular baddie. I finally want to make out withe the hot and cool boys,, get drunk, smoke and do other drugs. I wanna grow up and not be a scared baby anymore. I wanna do everything they did.

And most important:
I finally want to lose my virginity.

                               ~    ~    ~

Hey everyone! This is my first ever Wattpad story and I'm so flashed and happy right now! *screaming into a pillow* I hope you are as exited as i am, because i just published the first chapter of my book! I can't believe it guysss😍🥳

What do you think of Madeleine?

I know she seemed like 'that quirky pick me girl whose name is y/n' in the beginning, but this book will also be about character development, so i had to do her like y/n in the beginning, i hope it wasn't too cringe 😂💗

Another disclaimer: I am not a native English speaker, I'm learning English since 5 years and i still have a lot to learn, so if you notice any grammar mistakes or you know better formulations/words, please let me know in the comments of the paragraph!💗

I'm also not that happy with the cover, please suggest me how to improve and whether you like it or not!

Love you my sunflowers🌻
Your Ari:)