Besabriyan

25|TWENTY FIVE

When Maheen looked up at her father, she could vaguely remember the nights he rocked her to sleep- when she was so small to fit into his arms and when the world would disappear at his one smile, the memories were hazy and faded but she remembered how he used to hide her in his arms and put her to sleep. She used to be his entire world and he adored the ground his daughter walked on and suddenly everything was snatched away from within her reach. He would find her sitting in the stairs or going behind her mother to sleep in a cold room. He would find her alone- heck, he even found her delving to the darkness he painted around the house. In a matter of few moments, her father was gone. The man who dropped her off at Ahmed Residence was only the leftover of what he was- the man who had ceased smiling and the man who had lost life.

Things would have been much better if only she hadn't felt the need to hear her mother's darkest fears. Things would have been so much better if she had just taken a breath and accepted being in love with him, if she had just told her father and not lied to him about it. The days after that evening were hazy and unrealistic- the things she had done, the words she had said for him, her accusations, her tears and his engagement but when she had gathered her senses, it was too late to do anything- to say anything or to just apologize. That man, that now the world called her husband, would rip her off for what she had done to him just the same way he would rip the world for her.

"How could you forgive me?" She asked, pushing a distance between them and scooted away from her newly wedded husband- her eyes refusing to meet his.

"Forgive?" A low chuckle; darker than the nights and deeper than the oceans- the kind that devils owned, "I married you for your sake but I didn't say I forgave you."

And understandably so. She was the writer but he was so, so eloquent with his words that she dreaded the effect it would have on her. She created worlds and lived there for years but the world she was willing to create and live with him, might only be a stopping place before he mocked and threw her away from his life.

Remembering the last conversation they had before her mother moved them away and got her changed into a more breathable outfit, she heaved a sigh of despair in his direction. Kamran sahb was in a serious conversation with Abul Kashem sahb and Zaviyar- the three out of four important men in life. Meanwhile the older men seemed to be busy with professing their thoughts, the younger decided to bombard it with his opinions. Clearly that was the way he functioned. Quiet but unapologetic. The man wouldn't speak unless he thought it was necessary.

"Itna hi besabr ho toh baat karlo, apna hi shohar hain." Startled by which, she turned to push her cousin away. Daniyal grinned from ear to ear. Her face flushed, then drained colors. She was leaving everything behind including him. Daniyal was her anchor, the one that kept her afloat and the one that supported her throughout. The man who had protected her from her own demons and the man who had always stayed by her side.

Resting a hand over his and squeezing it, Maheen drank back her tears as it was getting unbearable to live in separation and in no moment Daniyal's smile dropped and concern wrote over on his face- the corners of his eyes crinkling with every passing minute and tears pooled in his waterline as he stared at his cousin. This was the moment where reality hit him- the only person he preferred over any other person since childhood was leaving the house permanently and that even if they did talk or meet, it wouldn't be the same as before.

The memories came rushing to him- sixteen years old ones to the fresh ones. He recalled how tiny she was when they met for the first time; frail, pale and short and now he was looking at the woman the little girl had grown into; graceful, pretty who at times made disastrous decisions. She would have still been in the house if she had married Rayyan and not Zaviyar. She would have still been in the house if her father hadn't asked her husband to take her with him so now she was leaving with nothing but only love to give. People loved Maheen, despite her being anti-social. While it took him a little while to realize for Daniyal that it was her fears that drove Manha to make horrible decisions, it didn't take much time to realize how much their neighbours adored her.