North Star [A Bensler FanFiction]

{1}

From her desk, Olivia looked around the squadroom. She had only been a member of Manhattan SVU for a few years, but that didn't change the way she felt about this precinct and those she worked with. As her gaze moved to a desk across the room, Olivia blushed when she met her boyfriend's eyes.

"Liv?" Elliot asked as he waved his hand at her. She spun to look at her partner, her cheeks still red.

"What's up?" She asked as she tried to keep her composure.

"You seem a little out of it. What's happening?" Elliot questioned. Olivia took a shaky breath, thinking about what would happen after work made her overwhelmed with emotion.

"N-nothing. Everything is great... I'm going to get a refill. Do you want more coffee?" Olivia mused.

Before Elliot could respond, Olivia was standing and walking to the coffee pots. Elliot watched with concern as Olivia's hand shook as she poured the hot, bitter liquid into her NYPD mug. 

"Hey," Brian whispered, as he took the pot from Olivia and emptied it into his own mug.

"Hi, baby," Olivia whispered back. The last thing she wanted was for everyone to hear what she and Brian talked about. They hadn't disclosed their relationship to Captain Cragen, and that was one of the main reasons they planned on leaving. 

"Did you finish your packing last night?"

"I did. How about you?" Olivia mused. 

"Everything is in my vehicle. I'm just so ready to get out of here and be with you out in the open," Brian smiled, his eyes brightening. Olivia looked at him and stopped herself from kissing him.

"I love you," Olivia whispered, her voice barely audible. Brian had to watch as her lips formed the words to know what she said. He smiled and winked at her before brushing past her to sit back at his desk.

///

Olivia grabbed the framed pictures from her desk and slowly placed them in her purse. As she was looking at a picture of herself and Elliot, tears slipped down her cheeks. 

"Why are you cleaning off your desk?" Elliot asked from where he was standing behind her. Olivia quickly brushed the tears from her cheeks before standing and turning to look at her friend. 

They had been through so much together that leaving Elliot behind was breaking Olivia's heart. However, she was in love with Brian, and leaving the city was the easiest way to be with him. They wouldn't have to disclose their relationship to the NYPD, and there wouldn't be any hoops to jump through if they wanted to proceed with their relationship. 

"I bought new frames, and it'll be easier to change out the pictures from my apartment. I can spread them all over the place and make my usual mess," Olivia said with a shaky smile.

"You are so weird," Elliot chuckled. He walked to Olivia and took the frame from her and smiled largely at the picture within.

"Do you want that one?" Olivia asked, even if she hoped that he'd say no. This picture was going to travel with her to wherever she and Brian wound up. 

"Nah, you can keep it. I just hope you don't put it in a pink frame," Elliot laughed as he passed the picture back to Olivia. Once it was tucked into her purse with the others, Olivia sat her purse down and hugged her partner tightly.

Elliot was one of the few people that Olivia actually let in. He was the one that made her feel confident in her performance as a rookie detective. His family became her family, but now she was walking away to ensure she had a chance to make her own family. Brian wanted a big family, and Olivia was so excited about the chance to be a mother.

"I love you, El. Have a good weekend," Olivia breathed as she fought off more tears.

"Benson, something is wrong. What is wrong? Did Cassidy say something stupid? Your mother?" Elliot questioned rapidly. 

Olivia leaned back and looked at him before gently caressing his rough cheek.

"Everything is fine, El. I promise. Now, tell those kids of yours that I love them. Have a good night," Olivia said with a forced smile.

///

"Alright, I think I secured everything in your car. I'm sorry that we couldn't take everything," Brian spoke, as he walked into Olivia's apartment. 

All the important items had been stored in both of their cars for the travel to the west coast. Olivia was leaving behind a lot of items that she had accumulated over the years. She knew that no matter how hard it was to leave things behind, she'd accumulate more junk with Brian by her side.

"It's okay," Olivia mumbled.

"Liv, are you sure that you want to leave? We can go to bed and unpack everything this weekend. Maybe we could move in together and disclose to Cragen."

"If we disclose, you'll be shipped to the other side of the city. We will both get in trouble for sleeping with each other, and that reprimand will forever be on our jackets... Babe, we want to start over. We can put down roots in a different place and raise our family there! Being here is too complicated, and all I need is you," Olivia replied passionately. She quickly looped her arms around Brian's neck before pressing a deep kiss to his lips.

As they parted, Brian tucked a short piece of hair behind Olivia's ear before caressing her freckled cheek.

"I love you so much, Olivia. I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you and have lots of babies with you."

"I'm fine ruining my body just to have a family with you," Olivia smiled. They kissed a handful of times before Olivia grabbed her spring jacket and tugged it on. Olivia put her apartment and building keys on the kitchen counter before moving to the open door. 

Turning to face the interior of her apartment, Olivia took a slow breath and flicked the light off as this chapter closed and a new one opened.