North Star [A Bensler FanFiction]

{20}

A week after Olivia moved out of Elliot's apartment, she had cooled off. She was no longer blinded with anger towards her former best friend and decided to just let things go. In the end, she may not have Elliot in her life.

"How are you feeling?" Alex asked, as they sat around the table and ate breakfast. Olivia was quiet as she ate her oatmeal and tried to figure out what she was going to do with her days. Last week she went to work with her friends and sat in during their trials, but that wasn't an option this week.

"I'm okay. Just tired," Olivia replied, as she sat her spoon down and reached for her orange juice.

"Are you sure there isn't something else bothering you?" Casey asked as she refilled her coffee before doing the same for her girlfriend.

"Casey," Olivia frowned.

"You need to be honest with us, Liv. If there is anything we can do to help you? Something to make you more comfortable?" Alex asked. Olivia sighed softly before setting her glass down and looking between her friends.

"I don't know what I'm going to do now that I'm settled. Do I try to go back to SVU or do I get a different job? I went to college, so I have different options, but I feel like I'm too old to start a new career."

"You aren't old, Olivia!" Alex exclaimed. Olivia laughed as she shook her head and stood slowly, taking her empty bowl to the sink.

"It's not like I'm in my twenties anymore. I'll be forty in a few years, and I don't want to start over again. Yet I don't want to go back to SVU and face Elliot every day. After seeing those disgusting pictures that Kathy sent, I don't want to look at him and see him bonking his ex," Olivia groaned as she scrubbed a hand down her face.

Casey and Alex exchanged a glance before Casey stood and moved to Olivia.

"Go back to SVU. You have just as much of a right to be there as Elliot does. You only have a few more months before Addie will be here, and they will drag on forever if you sit in your room all day."

///

Olivia walked into the squadroom and looked around for Elliot. When she noticed he was nowhere to be found, she walked quietly to Cragen's office and entered after knocking on the open door.

"Olivia? What are you doing here?" Cragen asked, as he leaned back in his chair and smiled at his former detective.

"Can we talk real quick?"

"Of course. Shut the door," Cragen replied. Olivia turned and shut the door before sitting down in front of his desk. She anxiously smoothed the wrinkles from her blouse before deciding to ask the question she had practiced on her ride there.

"May I come back?"

"Huh?" Cragen asked, confused.

"May I come back and work as your detective? I'd like to get back to work, and this is the place I'd like to work," Olivia replied nervously. She hated to beg for her job back, but there wasn't another way. At twenty-seven weeks pregnant, Olivia would be denied entrance into the NYPD until after her baby was born.

"Olivia, are you sure? Elliot works here, and he wasn't happy to see you." Cragen frowned deeply.

"Things are complicated with Elliot, but I'm an adult and won't let it disturb my work. I'm an amazing detective and even if I will be doing a different assignment until my daughter is born, I am willing to do anything to get back into this squad. Can you please give me another shot?" Olivia replied. She didn't know how she would react if she was told no.

Cragen looked into his squadroom and watched as Elliot walked in with a to-go cup of coffee in his hand. 

"You'll be at your old desk and working with Elliot. Can you handle that?"

"I think the question is if Elliot can handle that," Olivia replied with a nervous laugh.

"You are right... Let me make some calls and we can discuss things with Elliot. Until then, go home and get some rest. Okay?"

"I've been resting so often that I'm getting bored with that. If you don't mind, I'd like to wait here," Olivia spoke.

"If you'd like. Go see the guys, and I'll make those calls. Send Elliot in as well please."

Olivia left the office and walked towards where Elliot was sitting. She awkwardly cleared her throat before giving him an awkward smile as he turned to look at her.

"Olivia? What are you doing here?" Elliot asked as he stood quickly.

"Cragen wants to see you in his office," she replied.

"What? Am I in trouble for what happened at my apartment? That is just plain stu-" Elliot started, but Olivia interrupted him.

"He can't punish you for being a pig, but he'd like to talk to you. So, get in there," Olivia replied. Elliot nodded slowly before grabbing his cup and walking to the back of the room.

Olivia turned and smiled at Fin, before walking towards him and hugging him tightly.

"Why was Elliot a pig?" Fin asked.

"I think I'll save that story for another day. Until then, I'm going to bother you until Cragen gets done making some calls. I may be coming back to work here."

///

Elliot and Olivia were the last of the squad to leave that night. Elliot and Olivia stood quietly in the elevator as they waited for it to move to the lobby.

"Did you have a good day?" Elliot asked once they were walking towards the front doors.

"I enjoyed being back."

"Olivia-"

"You and I are nothing by co-workers. What you did and what Kathy did ruined everything," Olivia frowned.

"What did Kathy do?" Elliot asked, confused.

"She sent me pictures of you two having sex. I'm so glad she is just as sad as the day I left," Olivia sighed.

"I didn't tell her to do that, Liv. I'm sorry that she has been a bitch to you."

"Elliot, clearly there are loose ends that need to be tied up between you two. You also need to realize that I am never going to be with you. I think it would be good if I start working with Rollins or Fin," Olivia spoke, before walking down the stairs and wandering down the sidewalk to where her car was parked.