Ghost Kiss

Deacon

     I find myself thinking about her the whole time she's gone. Where did she go? Who is she with? Does she have a boyfriend? Am I going to have to hear her screaming someone else's name at night? NO! Stop thinking of any of that. As soon as my essence is built back up she's gone. I won't have to look at her or think about her ever again. Why do I find myself wondering if that's what I really want? "Of course, that's what you really want!" I scold myself.

     I'm standing at my window again and I see her truck pull up. I almost feel relieved but then I hate myself for it. I shouldn't be happy that she's back. I want her gone.

     I watch her walk up the pathway and hear the door unlock and open from downstairs. I don't even want to go downstairs. She's not going to know I'm there anyway so what's the point? It would only be for my own selfish need to look at her beautiful eyes again and then I'd hate myself for it afterward anyway.

     "Everything is falling into place so perfectly!" I hear her broadcast from downstairs. I know she's not talking to me. Curiosity finally gets the better of me and I head downstairs. I get downstairs as she's taking her flats off and as she begins to take off her shirt I turn around. Not going there again.

     It takes every ounce of strength I own to not turn back around until I'm sure she's properly dressed again. The memory of her sexy body tried creeping its way in but I shake it out immediately. I turn around after a few minutes and see she's put back on the same clothes she was cleaning in earlier.

     Does she not have other clothes? Surely she's got pajamas or something. I see her grab up the broom and bucket full of cleaning supplies and realize she's going back to cleaning again and probably doesn't want to dirty other clothes in the process. It makes sense.

     She doesn't go far though since she's now decided to clean the living room. I watch as she buzzes around the entire room. She's so thorough. "Stop complimenting her." I chastise myself. Nothing about this woman being here is good. It's only then that it occurs to me that I don't know her name. I can't even ask her for it.

     "Doesn't matter," I tell myself. She's going to be gone soon enough anyway. Knowing her name doesn't change that.

     I continue watching her. She hasn't stopped once. She's even brought more stuff in from her truck. I look up at the clock that she's put on the wall. It's 8 pm. Surprisingly, she's done a fabulous job. I haven't seen the house look like this since my grandmother was still alive. It brings back a lot of good memories. Some unwanted ones too.

     Out of nowhere, there's this loud annoying ringing that blares from her back pocket. It's that phone. She pulls it out and answers it. Please don't be a boyfriend wanting to come over tonight.

     "Hey, Mom!" Oh, thank god! "Everything is going pretty great actually. I've been mostly cleaning all day." I move in closer so I can hear what her mother is saying on the other end of the phone. "Oh, I could've come over and helped. It would've gotten done much faster." I hear her mother say. I can tell automatically that her mom cares for her very much. "Mom, I can handle it. I learned from the best OCD cleaner I know." She says back. She's smiling so brightly. They must be very close.

     "Tease all you want but nobody likes a dirty messy house. Especially when you meet a man to bring over." Her mother says. Met a man? So she hasn't met a man? So there is no man. That fact relieves me in more ways than I'll ever admit. "Mom I just got here, I haven't even gotten through the first night. Can we not immediately rush me into a relationship right away please?" I guess she's not eager for a relationship. Why does that bother me?

     I completely miss the rest of the conversation as I'm lost in my own chastising for being bothered by anything this woman is saying or doing. The only thing about this woman that should be bothering me is the fact that she's still here. And it does, bother me that is.

     "Ok, Mom I love you too. I'll let you know how my first day at work goes tomorrow." Then she hangs up the phone and puts it back in her pocket. So that's where she was today. I still don't know where she went but it was to get a job. Well, she will be quitting soon and moving right back to her parent's house. It's for the best. Her mom obviously misses her anyway.

     She's walking towards the bathroom and starts stripping halfway there and I quickly turn around again, but not fast enough because I still see the silky soft-looking skin of her stomach just as she's pulling her shirt up. I wish she'd stop doing that unannounced. But I guess I can't really blame her for not announcing it since she doesn't even know I'm here.

     What am I thinking? Of course, I can blame her! She shouldn't be here in the first place. My essence should be well built back up tomorrow. And that is when I will get rid of her.