N U M B ✔️

T W E N T Y - F I V E

'she's not strong anymore, she's just numb'

🖤

Willow Collins is a hell of a teenager if you ask me. I can't still believe I tried to kill myself.

Coming up from the subway, which I dreaded taking, since I was still trying to avoid Emma for a while. I made my way round the curb to the school gate. Mom and dad had searched for me that day, and Jay not helping the matter dropped me off at home, with me still in my wet clothes.

I had to sit through hours of lecture that I didn't have the energy for, literally. Luckily, I did not get to take care of Wendy for now, mum fears I'm bad company for her.

I really miss hanging out with her and all, but I'm just too tired to be disturbed about anything right now. Unlucky for me the only one aware of my suicidal attempt was Jay and Donnie in about a few minutes.

I had been avoiding both of them for a few days now and I knew I was running out of excuses, especially since I still have the art project to complete with Jay and that I and Donnie literally have the same schedule.

"Willow?" Donnie calls out to me with a straight voice. Gripping my back pack straps harder, I sighed, "I'm tired Don, can I at least go in" He narrows his eyes at me then nods. "Why do you look like dark side?" I sneered and glanced at him astonished at how he could joke with a straight face. "I don't" I reply taking a few books and shoveling my bag into the locker.

"Liar"

I turned to him, pissed at his choice of words "Whatever". Walking past him to our homeroom he tagged along, nagging me. "Did anything happen?" I tensed up at this then shivered remembering the sight of Tim's lifeless body in their arms. Was I acting too dramatic, I don't know? I just haven't been this scared before. It terrifies me to see him like that, but it terrifies me more that I would be like that if I'm not careful.

"So that's a yes"

I keep staring amidst until when Mrs. Daffodil came in to instruct us on a few things that I couldn't hear because of how far back I went to seat, not wanting to be around people. Luckily Donnie left me alone till the bell was rung,

"Willow" Donnie's says suddenly grabbing my shoulders and shoving us in the janitors closet, "what happened?" he looked so concerned and sincere that I wanted to cry. "N-No don't cry" Donnie says wiping my tears which I had no idea were already falling. Sobbing into him I sniffled.

"So what happened?" he asks and I tell him everything.

"Willow, he's not dead. What if you had died what would he do?" He says still holding me.

"B-B_" I sob more with tears streaking down my cheeks. This has to be the very first time I'm crying in front of someone.

"Okay what would I have done?" I ask him and he tried to pull off a smile with a shaky laugh. "I know it's hard, and that's why I'm here. Just hang in there please. I will be selfish to say I can't lose you" I cry more and fall into his chest. My sobs echoing against the tiny janitor's room.

"Why are you friends with me again?" I sniffle while still hugging him. "Man I don't know" He says and we laugh heartily.

"Jerk" He then gasps, "because I eat jerky that doesn't make me a jerk" I scowl at his poor joke and he laughs, "Where did you get that?" he then clasped his chest in hurt and I sighed adding, "sad is what it is"

Avoiding Jay was as hard as my history test. He was literary everywhere, except from my classes of course. Dragging out a seat from a desk in the far end corner of the library, I sighed. Eating had not been on occasion for me, I no longer had interest or zeal for anything anymore. Thankfully Donnie got tired of me on that one.

"Hey" A sudden all too familiar deep voice spoke taking the seat opposite me. I guess I forgot he spends lunch time in the library, why? Oh yeah, it is peaceful and damn right it was until now that is.

"Hey" He says again trying to gain my attention. I stare at my drawing and continue adding a few touches. "Willow" he says grabbing my pencil and looking down at my drawing. "What's that?" his eyes knowingly sparkles at me, making me almost feel guilt.

N U M B