Secrets I Wished You'd Know by Now

Changes

Things have changed.

Changed all around me,

for the better or for the worse,

I don't know for now,

but they've all changed

I am no longer the girl who would smile like an idiot 

at every small thing and then later scold herself in silence,

I no longer believe I can be loved or be pined after

like the girls I had seen in the movies,

The people who once loved me turn their faces away

scared I would try to make conversation,

afraid I would try to ask for an explanation,

Don't worry, I'll never ask out loud why you got tired ,

tired of picking up the love i served to you with my heart on fire,

I have burned for you, for your love 

burned and then turned into ashes,

Now I'm slipping through your fingers and you don't notice me at all,

even though I'm fading away.

But I still remember the way you used to look at me once.

Like I was the masterpiece you would take up your entire life to appreciate,

the one that would fill your heart with a thousand unexplainable ,

questionable emotions,

the one that would arise happiness and serenity in your mind to the extent of 

forgetting that which all around stood.

But now looking into those same pair of eyes,

I see none of it left, where they never there to begin with?

Was it all just in my head?

And while all of you have changed,

become unrecognizable in fact,

The heart of mine, once turned to ashes ,

still burns for you in silence.