Beautiful War

Chapter 13 True Feelings Revealed

After standing in the courtyard with the rain pouring down on me long after Hecuba's departure. I felt as if I was frozen the stone. A prisoner to my own indecision and fear for my daughter. I decided to return to my chambers in the palace. In the end Hecuba's words about a mother's love for her children touched my heart. She was speaking to me not as a queen but as one mother to another. So, I decided to stay. I would remain here in Troy, and do everything in my power to protect Hermione. This meant I would train with my brother until I was good or better then I was before. All in the name of love for my daughter. To protect her from any harm that may come our way. That will come our way as this war continues. The moment I entered my chambers, I had the servants prepare me a hot bath. An hour later I was letting the hot water soak into my cold body. I could feel my mind wander to Paris, and what I had confessed to Hecuba in the courtyard. I felt something for Paris, there was no denying that any long. He had managed to chip away at the stone that encased my heart. He had shown me so much affection and dare I say love in the short time we had been together. The words of Zues played in my mind over and over again. I was beginning to wonder if I should tell Paris how I felt about him. How I had been feeling since the moment I saw Paris in the throne room of Sparta. The sound of the door opening pulled me from my thoughts. I looked up and saw that it was my brother Pollux. I was confused as to why he was here.

"Pollux, I thought you would still be in the throne room with the other men. Discussing the strategy we would have in the coming war," I said. I sat up and leaned against the stone tub. I watched as Pollux pulled one of the trunks over to me and sat down.

"I was Helen. That was until I came upon the Trojan queen in the corridors, who told me that you tried to go back to Menelaus and give yourself up for Hermione," Pollux scolded. I knew that Pollux was angry, it was apparent from the way he was sitting. His shoulders tense and his mouth in a rigid line. I shrunk away from him, Pollux was rarely angry with me. And I did not like when he was. He often made brash decisions when he was angry. And that brashness often cost him something dearly. He had fallen out with our father many times over things he had done during battle. Decisions he made on a whim, decisions that often would decide the battle before him. We all knew that my brother's anger and brashness could cost him his life one day.

"Please Pollux, do not be angry with me. I was only thinking about Hermione and her future here in Troy. Thinking about your future, and I was thinking about Paris," I replied meekly. Pollux ran his hand through his hair. He then knelt down in front of me. He grabbed my hand. His hand was calloused from years of weilding a sword.

"I am not angry with you Helen, I am disappointed. I was beginning to see the old Helen again on the training grounds. The confidence you once had, coming back. But hearing that you were going to give it up... You have to stop believing that Hermione would be better off without you. That I would be better off without you sister," Pollux said softly but sternly.

"But you would Pollux. You would be better off without me. You are far stronger than I ever could be. But I could not do it... I could not leave my daughter. She needs me," I replied. Pollux shook his head fiercely, his eyes blazing.

"I could never be better off. I am not as strong as you think. The moment your heart stopped Helen, the moments I thought you were dead. Those were the worst moments of my young life. Never again would I feel that. And what about Paris? And what he feels about you," Pollux said with a raised eyebrow. I felt my heart flutter at the mention of Paris. Pollux saw this. Pollux could always see what was in my heart. Even before I did.

"You feel something for Paris? Don't you Helen," Pollux demanded. I sighed and rested my head on the stone tub. The stone felt cool against my heated skin. Pollux could always tell what I was thinking, how I was feeling.