Stay with me

Part 4

--- Three months since Alec's death ---

(Max is 4 and half years old here)

It was early in the morning, and Magnus was already dressed to impress. He has been struggling to sleep in his and Alecs bed in past few months, so he started a new habit to have nap in the evening after Max and Rafe go to bed and wake up at mid night and go through his and Alecs photos one by one. As an immortal being, Magnus has been so many relationships before Alec. He has outlived almost all of his love interests. He had lived together with some of his former lovers, shared a bed, shared a house, and shared life, but he has never been married. All the lovers before Alec were not able to bring all of Magnuss walls down and make him fall in love to the point that Magnus could not see a future with them. Then Alec came to his life. His shy little smirks, hazel colour eyes, raven colour hair, and his blushes made Magnus attracted to him. As he got to know Alec, Alecs rightfulness, generosity, protectiveness, and all the other qualities made Magnus fall in love with Alec. As a married couple, Magus expected to lose a bit of sparks between them, but he forgot that he was married Alexander Gideon Lightwood. Alec made Magnus surprised in the most unexpected ways. There has been more than once Magnus felt scared of how strong his feeling for Alec was because he knew that loss of Alec would tear him apart. It has been three months since Magnus had to let his Alexander go and pain, he was feeling was still very raw and he was sure, the pain would not become any less even in a century time.

Magnus was staring at his and Alecs wedding pictures when he heard Maxs yawn.

"Papa?" Max rubbed his eyes with his tiny fist while he was holding his most favourite action figure in his other hand. He looked adorable in his yellow ducks in hat pyjamas. His pyjama shirt has rolled up a bit and exposed, Max's chubby stomach.

"Yes, my little blueberry?" Magnus smiled softly as he observed his little blueberry.

"Can we make some pancakes?" Max stood in front of his papa and extended his littles arms so Papa would lift him up.

This is their normal routine. Max wakes up before Rafe, and till Rafe wakes up, Max will sit on Magnus's lap and talk about everything. Like what he dreamt about, what he wanted for breakfast, how cool superheroes are, and how much he misses his dada. Max didn't really understand the concept of death, but Magnus did not want to lie to their kids, so he explained the death of Alec to Max, in the most kids' friendly way. Max now believes his dada has gone on a long journey, and he is with angels. Max does understand that he would never see his dada again, but he knows that he should be a big boy and look after his papa and Rafe so dada would be so proud of him.

"What pancakes do you want my little blueberry?" Magnus kissed the side of Maxs head. Magnus instantly felt much better when he smelt Maxs unique baby scent. Max always smelt like milk and honey.

"Blueberry!" Max didn't need time to decide what pancake he wanted. He loves blueberries a lot, and he loved when his papa and dada called him blueberry. Of course, Magnus knew what Max would ask for, but he always gave Max more options in case he changed his mind.

"No chocolate chip pancakes?"

"No, just blueberry." Max started playing with one of Magnuss wrist bands.

"But what about Rafe?" Magnus placed another kiss on Maxs head.

"Hm," Max scrunched his forehead and his nose as he was in deep thoughts. Something he learnt from Alec.

"Okay... Let's make some chocolate chip pancakes as well. Only because I love Rafe."

"My good blueberry. How about you go and wake up your brother? Remember, you are going to see Madzie today."