Attic No POV
After Barbara got rid of Betelgeuse and Lydia ran to her room scared, she went back into the attic.
Barbara: great choice we've got here, we spend the next century either hanging out the window or doing parlor tricks.
Adam: maybe they'll leave now. That snake was a pretty nasty customer.
Barbara: well, he could've hurt somebody, he always hurt Wade.
Adam: but he didn't. We've got them right where we want them.
Suddenly a huge air gust was getting out of the model as they look in to see Betelgeuse roll out of a crash truck that hit a lamppost.
Betelgeuse:<gets up> you bunch of losers. How dare you interrupt a professional while he's working.
Barbara: I'm not fond of Charles Deetz particularly but you could've killed him.
Betelgeuse; hey, I'm just doing my job. Besides, I thought we had a deal. Hey, it's okay. You know why? I don't wanna do business with you deadbeats anyway. Thank you. The only one I think I can deal with is Edgar Allan Poe's daughter. I think she understands me.
Barbara:<grabs him> you leaver her alone, you...
Betelgeuse let spikes out of his body as Barbara dropped him as he got stuck to the fake grass as he wiggled a little before he lifted himself off the ground.
Betelgeuse: go ahead, make my millennium. <laughs> yeah. I'm feeling a little, uh, ooh, anxious if you know what I mean. It's been about 600 years, after all. I wonder where a guy, an everyday Joe like myself can find a little action.
Woman: hi~
Suddenly a whore house filled with horny succubus women appeared. A place called "Dante's Inferno".
Betelgeuse: yeah.
Music started playing as Betelgeuse comb his hair as the succubus were seducing him to come to them as he started dancing his way there.
Betelgeuse: oh! Oh, yeah. Here I come, baby. Oh, yeah. Hey, Adam, nice move.
Barbara: Adam, why did you build that?
Adam: I didn't.
Some smoke engulfed them and took them into the Afterlife Offices.
Juno's Office
Juno had a football team in her office. For some reason.
Juno: will you guys shut up and leave me alone? I've got all this paperwork to do.
The Miss Argentina girl knocked on the door as she had Adam and Barbara with her.
Juno: you two, come in here. Sit down. Get in here, both of you.
Adam and Barbara sat down in front of Juno.
Juno; the whorehouse was my idea. I want Betelgeuse out of the picture. Oh, you two have really screwed up. I received word that you allowed yourselves to be photographed. And you let Betelgeuse out and didn't put him back. And you let Otho get hold of the handbook.
Adam: the handbook? When?
Juno: never trust the living. We cannot have a routine haunting like yours provide proof that there is existence beyond death.
Player: coach. Coach, where's the men's room?
Juno: I'm not your coach. He survived.
Player2: wait, coach, let me get something straight. What's our curfew around here?
YOU ARE READING
Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!
ФанфикWade Maitland is the son of Adam and Barbara Maitland. Adoptive son. When his parents die, he is left alone in the big house until the Deetz arrive. They take him in but unknown to them, Adam and Barbara are ghosts, looking over their son. That is u...
