Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!

It's Show Time

Maitland/Deetz Home No POV

The model started shaking and rattling as Lydia backed off and everyone else wondered about the sound.

Betelgeuse: attention, K-Mart shoppers.

Everyone else went to see what was going on as Betelgeuse started emerging from the model as he had a merry-go-around hat as his arms were rolled up as he looked taller than everyone else.

Betelgeuse:<laughs> well, I'm back. I feel really good about myself. You know what I mean? So, without further delay... Welcome to Winter River Museum of Natural Greed. A monument to the bored businessman. Come on, a little closer. Step right up. Test your strength.

Betelgeuse unrolled his arms as the hands started inflating as those test your strength boards started coming up from behind Maxie and Sarah as they were amazed. Betelgeuse lifted the hammer hands and dropped them as he sent Maxie and Sarah through the roof, literally.

Betelgeuse: thank you. <jumps out of the model completely normal> thank you. Whoo! That... is why I won't do two shows a night anymore, babe. I won't. I won't do 'em. Well... what have we got here tonight, kids? Ooh, uh, well, we've got the, uh, the Maitlands. Uh, I think they've had enough exercise for tonight.

Betelgeuse pointed at Adam and Barbara as Wade went over to them to check on them. Otho attempted to just walk away but Betelgeuse ran and jumped on his back.

Betelgeuse: not so fast, round boy. We're gonna have some laughs. <kisses his cheek and cackles>

Betelgeuse went to Charles and Delia.

Delia: Otho!

A spotlight was put in Otho as Betelgeuse made a finger gun fire at him as his suit went from black and red to light blue and blue. Otho screams loudly and runs out of the house. Delia and Charles gestured Lydia to them as she ran to them.

Betelgeuse: mom, dad. <hugs all three of them> I just want you two to know you're welcome in our house anytime you want to come over. In the meantime, the dowry's on me, dad. <puts a snake on Charles's hand>

Adam and Barbara started getting up as Wade looked at what was happening in the living room.

Betelgeuse: well, the Maitlands are taken care of. <combs his head> everything seems to be pretty much back to normal, I think. <turns around and he was in a red tux> shall we?

Delia and Charles let go of Lydia as she was wearing a red wedding dress as Wade walked over and stood next to Charles and Delia. Lydia was lifted over to Betelgeuse and Betelgeuse locked arms with her. Adam's jaw fell but Barbara grabbed it and placed it back.

Betelgeuse: I called the caterers. Got a great band. Oops, we're gonna need witnesses. <looks at Delia, Charles and Wade> Would you?

Charles and Wade were gonna walk forward but the under struck as the glass case with Delia's sculptures opened and three sculptures started moving as Adam and Barbara saw them. One sculpture grabbed Charles, made him sit down and wrap him up tight. Another sculpture grabbed Delia and held her in place as it even squish her hat on top of her eyes. The third sculpture hoisted Wade in the air and kept him there with his arms behind his back and legs wrapped together as he tried to free himself but couldn't.

The chimney moved and grew to the size of an altar as a short and undead reverend walked out as Betelgeuse and Lydia walked over.

Betelgeuse: come on, let's go. Let's get on with the ceremony.

Revenrend; do you, Betel-

Betelgeuse: aah! Ooh, ooh, uh-uh-uh! Nobody says the "B" word. Come on.

Reverend: do you take this woman to be your wedded wife?