The King's Court

LXIV

"This tastes like shit," muttered Arleigh and dropped the spoon.

"Maybe if you stopped brooding like a lovesick fool you'll appreciate my cooking," Mark said and Arleigh rolled her eyes. Hindi tumakas sa paningin ko ang lungkot sa mga mata ni Arleigh. I guess we're all missing something from the other world. 

I just shook my head and tried Mark's recipe. I almost threw up.

Nakita ni Arleigh and reaksyon ko at tinuro niya ako.

"Kita mo. Pati si Evelyn nasusuka."

Mark gave me a look of dismay.

"I'm sorry, Mark. I'm sure you'll do better next time." Nginitian ko siya at nagpakawala lang siya ng buntong-hininga at kinuha ang mga plato sa mesa.

"Kapag naayos ko na 'yang lutuin, you're not eating, Arleigh."

Tumaas ang kilay ni Arleigh. "Bakit ako lang? Eve found it disgusting too!"

Nginitian ko silang dalawa at saka napatingin sa orasan.

"Shit, I'm going to be late." Agad akong tumayo. Medyo malayo pa naman ako sa workplace ko since nag sleep over kami sa condo ni Arleigh. Yeah, full-grown adults having a sleepover. But who's stopping us? We're all sad and we needed each other's company. 

I am thankful for meeting them dahil wala talaga akong mga kaibigan noon. I guess I should have thanked Evelyn as well for giving me these people in my life. Kahit alam na nina Arleigh at Mark na hindi ako ang unang Evelyn na nakilala nila, their treatment did not change. 

"Do you want me to give you a ride?" tanong ni Mark sa akin. I shook my head.

"It's fine, Mark. Dinala ko ang sasakyan ko. I'll see you both tomorrow. Don't forget our dinner."

They both nodded and I waved them goodbye. I didn't have many tasks to do today. I now work as an instructional designer for a company that provides learning materials for vocational courses in foreign countries. The subject is mainly English.

I smiled bitterly as I recalled something. In Roatia, they call it the Roatian language.

I sat in my car just right on time when my tears started to fall. Sometimes, it's better. Sometimes it felt like I was on that battlefield again, carrying him in my arms as he took his last breath. There are days that just felt heavier than others. 

"Oh, god," I muttered as I started to sob. Walang araw na hindi ko siya naiisip. I would think about the dream he once told me or fantasize about what could have been if we lived in the same world. Or if he lived. Hindi ko alam kung hanggang kailan ako magiging malungkot. I don't know if I'll be able to get over him. 

Kinalma ko ang sarili ko at mahigpit na napahawak sa manibela. I can't mess up at my workplace today lalo pa at ngayon papasok sa office ang bagong boss namin after his treatment. Evelyn told me to thank him for saving me. Saving her when she stayed her. But all I could care about is not to mess things up at work especially since this is my first day to go back to work after my...trip.

I sighed. I can't be miserable forever. I did promise him I would live happily. It may not come as quickly as I wanted but I'm getting there. I need to get there. I want to reach the stage of peace when I can think of him fondly with no heartaches at all. That's all I want. I know it is what he wants as well.

Napatingin ako sa rearview mirror at labis na lang ang gulat ko nang makita kong may nakaupo roon. Agad akong napabreak sa sasakyan dahilan para mahulog sila. Mabuti na lang at hindi pa ako nakalabas sa parking area.

Nanlalaki ang mga mata kong nakatingin sa dalawang lalaking nakaupo.

"Are you really allowed to maneuver this piece of object--"