Different Worlds

Stronger Feelings

I began walking back to the camp after a few hours. I had stayed on my own for a fair while, trying to sort through these new and powerful feelings that I was experiencing. It wasn't easy. By the time I got back to the camp, there were campfires glowing, and darkness had fallen rather rapidly. The delicious aroma of food reached my nose, but I found that I had no appetite. My one goal was to find the object of my feelings.

I found her sitting next to a fire outside Bronson's shelter, a bowl of food balancing on her knees. Her face seemed pale in the firelight, but she seemed to have recovered from her ugly experience that afternoon. Bronson, Jacek and Evan were with her, and as I got closer I realized they were talking about what to do now that Sienna was with us. Sienna looked up at that moment and spotted me coming towards her, and she offered me a small, tired smile. I returned it as I sat down carefully beside her. I looked into her bowl. It looked like she was eating another stew.

"That any good?"

She gave her slender shoulders a shrug. "It's okay. Not as good as Jacek's though."

The grin I gave her was more natural this time. "Not many here can cook as good as Jacek can." I paused a moment. "So, you're feeling better now?"

She grimaced for a second. I guessed she was remembering what she'd gone through before. "Better than before." Her voice grew softer ad her eyes were downcast. "I thought I'd be able to handle it. I never imagined just how much it would hurt." Her voice broke on the last word, and I felt a surge of anger race through me as I looked towards Evan. I took a couple of deep breaths to calm myself. I still couldn't believe how much havoc one person could wreak on my life. Just days ago I had been in complete control of my feelings and emotions. I knew who I was and where I was going in my life. But since meeting this fragile human girl - I just couldn't get over how much she was changing me. Was it possible to fall in love with someone so fast? Was I in love? Was this feeling that was coursing through my body - this strange madness that everyone seemed to experience at least once in their lifetime - was it really love? I looked over at Sienna again, and the feelings I had grew so pronounced that I knew what the answer was. It was the reason why I had gone slightly crazy that afternoon when I had seen Sienna in pain. I knew that I would do anything I could to keep her safe. I glanced up and saw Jacek watching me. He knew me so well. He'd known what I was feeling before even I had. He gave me a cheeky grin, and I couldn't help scowling back. He was enjoying this a little bit too much for my liking. I looked back at Sienna, and I realized that she was watching me with a puzzled expression on her face.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked.

"Why?" I asked back, caught off guard. Right! Like I was going to tell her what had just been running through my mind.

She shrugged again. "You just looked very thoughtful, that's all."

"It was nothing," I lied. "Just thinking about what's going to happen in the future."

Sienna grimaced again. "You mean about me having to take on Netiri?" I saw a shiver run through her body, and I frowned.

"Nobody can make you do anything that you don't want to do."

"But everybody expects me to -"

"Forget about everybody else," I cut in. "You won't have to do anything that you don't feel comfortable with." I looked her straight in her clear, emerald eyes, and her I heard her catch her breath. "I promise."

She nodded slowly, seeming unable to speak. I could feel my brow crinkle a little as I watched her. "What's wrong?"

"It's just that this is the first proper conversation I've had with you." She gave me a half-smile. "Without you teasing me, that is." Her half-smile became a full smile. "It's nice."

I smiled back. She didn't know that all of that teasing I dished out to her was just a way to cover up the feelings I that hadn't realized I'd been beginning to have for her. Teasing just seemed to be an easy way out. I hadn't had any idea how else to behave around her. I took a deep breath. I wanted to tell her how I felt, but for the first time in my life, I was scared. No, I corrected myself. Not scared. Just worried about how she would react. I knew that if I told her, there would be no going back. If she didn't feel the same way, I was still going to have to face her knowing that she knew. I realized that I hadn't let out the deep breath I had taken the moment before. Slowly, I let it out. I had been in a few battles in my life, and I had always faced my opponents with no fear. Yet, here I was, too much of a coward to tell someone I had feelings for her. I scowled to myself as I thought about that. Every fiber in my being rebelled at the idea of being branded a coward - even to myself. Especially to myself. On that thought alone, I made up my mind. I was not a coward. I took another deep breath as I prepared to say some words to her that could possibly change my life forever.

Just as I was about to confess everything, a scream pierced the air, and everyone jumped up simultaneously. I had mixed feelings about the interruption. A small part of me was annoyed that I hadn't been able to get it over with, while the majority of me was intensely relieved.

"Who was that?" Sienna was looking around, her eyes wide with fear.

I looked up just in time to see Evan bolt into Rochelle's shelter, and everyone followed. As Sienna and I got there, Evan was helping his sister out of the shelter. Her face was pale white and tense.

"Rochelle?" Evan looked at his sister with worry clear in his face.

"I had another dream." Rochelle's voice was strained.

"Just forget about it." Evan's words were full of relief. "It was just a dream"

Rochelle shook her head. "No, it was more than that. It was so real."

"But you're awake now," Evan soothed. "There's nothing to worry about."

Rochelle was shaking her head quite vehemently now. "No, you don't understand. Netiri's soldiers are on their way. They'll be here within two hours."

Evan looked at his sister closely. "But it was just a dream."

"I know." Rochelle spoke quickly. "It's hard to explain, but I know it's going to come true. I just know. We have to leave now!"

I looked down at Sienna, and saw her eyes glued on Rochelle's pale face. As much as I hated to admit it, I agreed with Evan - it was just a dream. But the intense fear I could feel radiating out of Rochelle made me feel otherwise. And there was no way I was going to take a chance with Sienna's life.

"Let's get out of here then." I spoke up loudly, and everyone turned to look at me. I looked straight at Jacek, and after a moment he nodded.

"Okay, let's grab everything we can carry and move out."

As soon as Jacek had spoken, everyone flew into action, trying to grab all of their possessions. I looked at Sienna, and I could see the stress on her face. It killed me that I couldn't reassure her that everything was going to be okay. I slowly put my arm around her, and she looked up into my face.

"It's my fault," she whispered. "They're coming here because of me - it's my fault."

"No," I disagreed. "You're our hope. You've given everybody here hope, and that's something that we haven't had in a very long time. You are not to blame for anything." She cast her eyes down again, and I could tell that my words hadn't soothed her much. When she looked up again, she had a determined expression on her face that I didn't understand.

"I can do this," she spoke forcefully, and I frowned. "No matter what it costs me, I can do this. I can face Netiri and save these people."

My frown grew more pronounced. No matter what it costs me. I didn't like that. Everyone viewed her as our Saviour, but she was my one reason for living. I would see her through this alive - no matter what it cost me.