"Noelle." He spoke.
That was my first time hearing my name off his lips, and I may have lost my cool for the first time in my life.
"Now that I say it, you're more of a Noelle than a Nikki" he gave a goofy grin.
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Noelle.
I hobbled down the set of stairs, one shoe off my foot, leaving the post office to head to my car. On the way out the post office, one of the heels on my shoe broke. When I made it to my car, I got in and heaved a giant sigh as I threw my purse into the back seat of the 2012 Buick I bought off the used car lot when I first moved to San Francisco. My very first ever big girl purchase.
Today has been a day. Lani had a mini tantrum before school, and though I'd never want to put her through the same disciplinary actions that I went through as a kid, when she has her moments where she refuses to express her emotions in the plethora of healthy ways that I've taught her, I always think about ditching my gentle parenting ways and giving her a good little love tap.
I have to constantly remind myself that it took me 22 and a half years to learn how to healthily express my emotions. Its unfeasible to expect a 5 year old to not throw a temper tantrum every now and again, especially one like her who is used to getting her way. She's a good kid, great even, but like most of the human specie, she has her days.
The proposal/maternity shoot that I'd had booked for over 3 months canceled on me last minute. Normally a cancellation fee of $45 is required, but something in my heart wouldn't allow me to enforce that rule today. I figured it was a sign that I should check Leilani out of school early and spend the day with her since she got worked up this morning about having to wake up. She cried as I physically picked her up out of her bed, kicking and screaming.
Lani is not particularly keen on waking up any earlier than 9:30am, so on most school mornings when she has to get up at 8:00, no later than 8:30, she puts up a fight. We both overslept today, and normally, I take that as a sign from the good God above that we should just spend a day together and I cancel any plans that I may have, no matter how important.
I knew that I had a shoot booked today and since I take my craft, and profession, seriously, I don't like to cancel on any clients that I have bookings for months in advance, especially when they pay the booking fee and are regulars of mine.
While leaving my studio, I got a call from Aria, my best friend who lived in Seattle. One of two of the only people who I still had contact with from the place that held my sweetest and most overbearing memories.
"Hey, I got a call from Ayva, she gave me a letter and told me to mail it to you a few days ago, I forgot to tell you until just now, i'm sorry. When I told her I didn't know where you were she didn't take that for an answer and asked me to mail it out for her, so be on the look out for that." Aria spoke through the speaker, my phone blue-toothed to my car's stereo.
My face scrunched together as I lifted my head from my steering wheel, "A letter? From Ayva?" I questioned, pure confusion on my face. "Yeah, she told me to Mail it off. I have to go, love you" she spoke quickly, I figured she was busy so I gave her a quick 'love you' before I sat in silence in my vehicle after she hung up. A latter from Ayva. Did she find out about Leilani and now she's pregnant? Did something happen to one of our parents? Did she find me?
