Noelle.

EIGHTEEN.

Aria.

"Noelle, you need to slow down" I spoke, reaching over her head attempting to grab her fourth drink of the night. After today, I could see this coming. She's been going back and forth in her mind since last week, but finding out that Jeremiah was gonna be around way more than she anticipated was eating her up, and when huge things like this are out of her control, she blows up and turns to the bottle. I don't care what anyone says, the shit is hereditary.

All she's seen all her life is her parents deal with their life by drinking it away, it was bound that one of them would pick up on that addiction, it sucks that it's my best friend, but as long as I'm around, I won't let her go down that path that she went down before she had Leilani again. She's got a child to take care of this time around, I wasn't gonna let the shit that happened before happen again.

I won't lie and say that I didn't enable her back then cause I did. I was her drinking partner, and while I didn't do it all day every day, I've had my moments where I've gotten drunk to the point where I'd fall out. Her and I would take turns being the DD, so when I saw that she was getting up there with her drinks, I'd stay as sober as possible, and vice versa. It would be a different story if I knew she didn't have so much on her mind and if there wasn't something that she was running from or trying to drown her sorrows in. She's been building such a lasting and deep relationship with God and I know how much her beliefs mean to her.

"I'm not even that drunk, just slightly tipsy" she slurred, her face inches from mine and a giddy grin on her face. Her eyes were barely opened, this last drink was gonna send her closer to the edge, and I wasn't gonna allow that, I don't care how upset she got. I shook my head, staring in her eyes, "Let's go to the bathroom, I have to pee" I lied, standing up and grabbing her wrist, not even giving her the chance to disagree with me.

We were at Ayva's bachelorette party at some night club, all her bridesmaids wearing cute little white dresses, Ayva wearing a pink one, as I drug Noelle to the exit next to me, my purse hiked up on my shoulder. Almost everyone that we came with was drunk or on their way to being drunk. Noelle had arranged everything from San Francisco when she made it home last week, thinking that this was a chill place where everyone would just casually sip, talk, and sing some karaoke, but it was far from that tonight. I don't know if it's cause it's a Saturday night or what but the place was packed and the singing was hurting my ears, but drunk people will dance to just about anything I guess.

"Why are we out here?" She asked, looking around at the packed parking lot. "Noelle, sit down" I spoke sternly. She sat, even though I knew she didn't want to. I feel like we're both very nurturing to each other but Noelle shows more tough love than I do. She's a mother, and even before she was a mother, she was a mother. To Ayva, to Keith, hell, even to her parents. No one ever really heard her out unless she gave tough love, and she got a lot of shit from her parents which made me want to be more gentle with her when I told her what she needed to hear, but it's my turn to show her some tough love without making her feel like shit the way her parents did. That's a wound that still isn't fully healed and I'd hate for her to feel like I'm picking at it in any way.

"You have a lot on your mind and you've had a lot on your plate for the past week or so, but I need you to shape up and start opening your mouth and telling me what's really going on in your mind. I can't be here for you and support your decisions that you make if I don't know what you're thinking. Getting drunk and trying to drown out whatever is gnawing at you isn't the way to go, and you know this from past experience. Jeremiah is gonna be around now, whether you like it or not. Some secrets aren't meant to be taken to the grave, Noelle. Open your mouth and tell me what you're thinking" I spoke sternly, staring down at my friend, trying to make her understand my words.