Love In The Shadows: Christian Romance

•Thirteen•

•Ricky's Heartache•

Ricky loved his mother, Ms. Riley, more than anything in the world. Her warm smile and gentle words had been his guiding light since he was a child, his face filled with affection and admiration. But now, as he watched her battle cancer, he felt helpless and desperate to do something, anything, to make her suffering easier, his brow furrowing with worry.

Ever since he came back from college, Ricky tried to help his mother with the smallest tasks, from making her tea to fluffing her pillows, his expression showing care and concern. He'd even offered to move back in with her until she could start taking care of herself, but Ms. Riley's faith in the Lord was strong, and she knew where she was going once she passed, her face displaying unwavering faith.

"Ricky," she coughed, "Why are you pacing the floors like a wild dog on the loose?"

Ricky stopped pacing the floors and he smiled at his mother, his face showing relief, "No reason! I'm just thinking to myself, that's all."

Ms. Riley raised her eyebrow, her expression curious, "About what?"

Ricky shrugged his shoulders, "About food because I'm kind of hungry, what about you mom, are you hungry?"

Ms. Riley sighed, "You just fed me an hour ago, son!"

"Right!" Ricky replied in embarrassment, "But hey, if you need anything to drink or eat, then I'll go in there and fix it up for you-"

Ms. Riley interrupted her tone firm, "Son, come sit down with me for a second. Sit on the edge of the bed and talk to me."

Ricky sat on the bed, a bit worried about what Ms. Riley wanted to talk about, his anxiety was through the roof

Ms. Riley grabbed his hand and said, her voice filled with love, "My time here is limited, and it's time that you get me a nurse."

"Mama, no!"

"Ricky, let me finish..."

Ricky went quiet then Ms. Riley continued, "I want a nurse to come and look after me, then I want you to go on about your life. I don't want you moping around, trying to take care of me, meanwhile, your life is on hold. I will not allow it!"

Ricky's eyes welled up with tears, and he shook his head in sadness. "But, Mom, I can't bear to let anybody else watch you when I can do it by myself. I want to be here for you, always."

Ms. Riley reached out to caress his cheek, her hand trembling, "I know, dear but, you can't be my nurse forever. It's time for you to spread your wings and live your life."

Ricky's voice quivered as he struggled to hold back his tears, "But Mama how can I do that when you're in bad condition like this? I will never be able to live with myself knowing that I practically left you here to die by yourself."

Ms. Riley smiled through her pain, her eyes filled with love and wisdom, her face reflecting strength and compassion. "Ricky, don't talk like that! I'm going to die regardless if you were here or not. But what matters the most is that I'll always be with you, watching over you, and guiding you. I'll be an angel on your shoulder, helping you find your way."

Ricky sighed, "I don't even know which way to go because it seems as if God just took everything away from me."

"He did not!" Ms. Riley replied, with belief in her heart, "God is going to bless you more than he ever has once I'm gone. You'll find a job under your degree, a wife, and a stable home. You will find your way, I promise!"

Ricky responded, "Mama, that's what I wanted to tell you, it's been hard for me to look for one. Ever since-"

"-Ever since you came here, you've lost track of your own life, I know!" Ms. Riley interrupted.

Ricky begged with reassurance, "Mama, don't say that! You haven't held my life back."

Ms Riley sighed, "I know that I've been a burden to you."

Ricky grabbed his mother's face and wiped her tears, his expression filled with tenderness and affection, then Ms. Riley looked at him and said, "I'm serious! I want you to go get your life back."

After a heart-to-heart talk with his mother, Ricky understood he needed to find a nurse. It was tough to call, but he did it.

On the phone, Ricky said, "I want to make sure my mom gets the best care. She has cancer, her medicine isn't working, and I'm worried."

The nurse on the other end assured him, "We have experienced nurses who know how to care for people like your mom. We'll find the right nurse for her."

After the phone call with the nurse, Ricky walked back into the room with his mother and said "I got what you wanted. Happy now?"

She smiled and said, "Yes! Can you get the picture book over there?"

Ricky sat down next to his mother, Ms. Riley, with a weathered photo album in his hands. They both smiled as they opened it, revealing memories from their past.

Ricky pointed to a picture of himself as a young boy, beaming with excitement, standing between his mom and dad in front of Cinderella's Castle at Disney World. "Mom, remember this? Our first trip to Disney World as a family."

Ms. Riley's eyes sparkled as she looked at the photo. "Oh, Ricky, that was such a magical time. Your dad and I saved up for that trip, and seeing the joy on your face made it all worth it. We rode every ride and met all the characters, didn't we?"

Ricky nodded. "Yeah, we did, Mom. It was the best vacation ever."

As they turned the page, they came across a picture of younger Ricky visiting his dad in the hospital. Ricky's dad was lying in a hospital bed, his face pale but his smile still warm. "Pops had kidney failure at this time," Ricky whispered.

Ms. Riley nodded, her eyes glistening with tears. "Your dad was a strong and loving man. I remember I was acting the way that you are now. I wanted to go with him and even though it was hard to let him go, I can still feel him here. He wanted to spend as much time with you as possible."

Ricky swallowed hard, his throat tight with emotion. "I miss him so much."

His mother placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "I know you do, Ricky. You know that we'll both be with you right?"

Ricky didn't answer, he just turned another page, and there was a picture of Ricky as a teenager. He laughed, "I remember this!! My rebellious teenage years, I gave you a hard time, didn't I? Stealing, sneaking out, and coming home late. I wish I could go back and change everything just to spend more time with you."

Ms. Riley laughed softly. "You were just finding your way, Ricky. We had our disagreements, but I knew it was all part of growing up. You turned out to be a fine young man."

Ricky smiled, grateful for his mother's understanding. "You were patient with me, Mom. I appreciate it more than you know."

As they continued to flip through the album, Ricky and his mother shared stories and memories, finding comfort in the bond they had built over the years and the love that had remained strong through all of life's challenges.

When the nurse arrived, Ricky showed her around the house and explained his mom's likes and needs. It was hard for Ricky to trust someone else with his mom's care, but he knew it was needed. He also knew he needed a job so that he could keep up with her hospital bills.

The end of this chapter