Too Late.

chapter nine

Niall's POV

Just then I felt four more pairs of arms wrapping themselves around me. "Congratulations Nialler." Liam said from somewhere behind me. "Your dad would be really proud of you, babe." Josh said and kissed my forehead. His words found place in my heart making it feel warmer. I truly wishe he was here. "Thank you guys much for everything." I wishpered giving them a big smile. They all let go except of Zayn. He kept his arm around my solder in a protective manner. I tried not to smile and it wasn't that hard as I look at Perries face. "Okay great shoe can we leave now!" She snapped rudely. Zayn quickly let go of me and went to her. He kissed her making me look down. He would never love me. I will never be enough for anyone. Especially Zayn..he is the definition of perfection while i define weakness. I let out a shaky breath as he spoke. "Yeah sure let's get going." He said smiling. "Before we leave I wanted to ask you guys if you wanted to come with us tomorrow night. There's this big party and it would great if you came along." Liam said while looking straight to Joshie's eyes. I smiled thinking how lucky they were. "We'd love to come. Right niall?" Josh asked looking at me hopefully. I really didn't want to go. There would be alcohol and people and zayn with Perrie and of course I nodded smiling at him. I would never put my happiness over anyone's else's. He squealed and turn to look at liam who was grinning like a child. I looked at Zayn who was with Perrie a few meters away from us. They were laughing and being happy and I couldnt keep my emotions in so I run out. "Niall where-?" "To get some fresh air." I tried to smile at Liam. Once I was out I couldn't stop the sobs the were falling from my mouth. Why can't I be enough? Why everything I do is wrong? I'm so fucking useless and ugly and fat and everything. I fucking hate me. At this point I couldn't even breath properly. I sat down pulling my knees up and burring my face on them trying to breath. I felt someone sitting beside me and then I was pulled into an embrance. "Hey now. What's all these about. Relax Nialler. Com in take deep breaths." It was Harry. I tried to do as I was told. I kept talking long breaths till I stipend shaking so much. "Th-thanks Harry." I stutter out. "He does like you Niall. Its hard him. He s been with her for so long and he doesn't want to hurt her. He wants to leave her but he can't bring himself to." He said while kissing my forehead. "He doesn't like me. He can't like me. I'm not worth it. I don't deserve him. She is so beautiful. He would never leave her to be with me." I cried out letting Harry a part if me only Josh has know so far. "Don't you ever say that again Niall. You are trully beautiful inside and out and everyone would be stupid enough to leave you."