My You | BTS (Bangtan Sonyeondan): The Final Book in the 'Euphoria' Trilogy.

"With You, I Just Can't Get Enough..."

Listen To: "By My Side" by JUNNY
———————————————-
[Please, assume all conversations are in Korean]

I wipe the sweat off my face as I look around the room, wondering if there is anything I missed. My anxiety is through the roof and I know that it's not something that needs to be this dramatic but my mind can't help but think of all these scenarios and conjuring up fake situations the could or might happen. I arrange the pillows one more time and get frustrated when they don't look how I want them to. I feel arms around my waist, pulling me back as I lose my balance and the moment his breath hits my ear, I know who's holding me.

"Princess, everything is perfect. You need to relax," he mumbles as his lips press against my neck and I close my eyes and let out a sigh; all my anxieties and worries leaving along with it. It's hard to feel anything but happy when you're embraced by pure, beautiful, sunshine.

"I just want to make sure he's comfortable," I tell him as i lean into his chest and his hands wrap all the way around me.

"With his room or with us?" He says and I stiffen at the fact that he might be right. I've been worried that once he gets here, he will see our dynamic or the way we live our lives and suddenly be against it.

"I just, I want this to be perfect. I want him to love you as much as I do. I want him to love me and my life and I want to have a dad," I say to him, letting my true and honest feelings out. I know I can be open with anyone one of them, but with Hoseok it's so easy. He already has seen me in my weakest and most vulnerable state; he makes me feel like it's okay to be unguarded with him.

I honestly think it's because ase of our physical relationship, to be honest. I think that he's allowed me to be so open with him, to trust him to do things to me and with me that I'd never feel comfortable with doing before him, that it makes me feel like if I can physically give myself to him to openly, than I can do so with my heart. Also, I think the fact that it took a little bit longer for Hobi to me emotionally vulnerable with me, makes me feel like he truly trusts me more than anyone else and that trust from him means more to me than anything else. We can be our most raw and true selves with each other and it's beautiful.

"Baby girl," he says as he turns me in his arms to face him, sits on the edge of the bed and places me in his lap. "He loves you. He looked for you for so long. He wanted you," he reminds me, as his thumb strokes my cheek. "I know you have this trauma that you carry with you; it will be with your your whole life, but while that trauma affected your past, you can't let it affect your future," he reminds me.

He's right. Of course he's right. He's so much wiser and more astute when it comes to matters of common sense than I am. Hoseok is rarely ever affected by things like this, he thinks about things in a very natural way instead of over dramatizing small things; unlike myself.

"Yeah, you're right," I say to him. I lean down and rake my fingers through his hair and place a soft kiss on his lips.

"Mmmmm, I missed you," he whines and I can't help but smile against his lips. It's been a few days since he and I have had some time to ourselves and we are like a pressure cooker when we haven't been near each other for a few days; ready to explode.

"Go on a date with me?" I ask him. He looks at me, confused and I mean, I get it. Dates aren't something we can do easily or frequently so whenever the mere thought of going out into the world together, we wonder how we can even do it. But when I was planning the trip to the airport to go pick up my dad, I knew the others were going to be at the company all night and Hoseok had already finished with his schedule so I saw it as the perfect opportunity to spend time with him and prepared this surprise for us.

"A date? Where are you taking me Sweetheart?" He asks me as he pulls me to face him, straddling his lap. I tug on the hair on the nape of his neck and push myself further onto him.