Break The Distance

11

You spend a lot of time getting to know all of Stray Kids during their break. It's fun, and soon all the members know where your apartment is for some reason. You don't mind, though. Jisung sleeps over a lot so it's only fair that his brothers want to check in on him. However, you're not sure what he'll do after the hiatus because he's grown rather attached and uses any opportunity to touch you or hold you.

The both of you do lots of things together- games, movies, cooking, subtle dates. Jisung has a lot of energy when he's excited about something, and you love it. You love him. You're only more sure of it the more time you spend with him. But he never brought up the passionate moment you shared the first night and changed the subject when you tried bringing it up.

You don't want to push it, your relationship is nice as it is. So you don't bring it up again, and avoid anything more than hugs, unsure what made him so uncomfortable.

Jisung on the other hand, is so happy you're around. He feels so calm and relaxed with you and he can be himself. The only other people he's that close with are his members and family. But you're different as his soulmate; your touch brings a softer element to it, the feeling only soulmates can share.

It scares him a little, you make him lower his guard so easily so he tries to hide it. Jisung doesn't feel like he's allowed to feel that way, he doesn't deserve you because he's already asked for too much becoming an idol. You're just so wonderful to him, you laugh at all his dumb jokes and take his ramblings seriously, your presence alone helped him to calm down from his panic attack and he's sure you would have continued to comfort him if you hadn't been called away to do your job. It scares Jisung, he's never been in a relationship before, and he's fallen so hard for you.

What if you don't really like his softer side? What if you don't like a man who doesn't take charge of everything? What if you get tired of his anxiety? You don't initiate physical affection often, and that makes him anxious too. So he avoids it, relishing being able to hold you because he wants to take advantage of however long you'll let him be around you. He's scared you'll grow tired of him.

You and Jisung are hanging out again today, a simple night of cuddling on the couch watching some show you're not paying attention to anymore. Jisung is intently watching, not even cuddling you anymore from how concentrated he is. You think it's cute and you don't want to affect his ability to see the screen by pulling him to your side again, so you just subtly watch his expressions as he watches the TV. Eventually, you notice he's fidgeting nervously. His arm keeps moving towards you and then returning to his side.

You wonder if he's battling over watching TV and cuddling again. He does that sometimes- struggling to pick one thing or another. You're not sure how to start cuddling or initiate any physical contact really, Jisung initiates it most of the time so you decide to ask.

"Ji, can I cuddle you?" you ask.

"Hmm? Sure," he absently responds, distracted by a plot twist on the screen.

You shift and lay down on the couch with your head in his lap. He stiffens up, or maybe that's just what it feels like to cuddle. You sigh contentedly, enjoying the contact you had been missing since Jisung got into the show and moved away from you. His fidgeting resumes before he decides to rest a hand on your waist, rubbing circles softly.

"Is this okay?" he asks softly.

You hum in agreement, he feels nice. So nice you drift off with the TV as background noise.