11 pm
Ive never felt so isolated before. A kind of feeling i fear is unique to someone like me. Or someone a combination of characteristics that i feel like shouldnt be a combination at all. Someone shouldnt have to live like this. its so exhausting. How i think, how i feel, how im treated. and how i slowly realize how badly im treated.
Like. is it my fault my upbringin was like this? why do you have to. disregard me like this. what was i supposed to do.
I've no one to talk to anymore. Or maybe thats my fault. I dont know anymore.
I've so much thoughts that I'd rather not share adn im not sure if anything i do will make it worse or better. or do nothing at all. and even now i cant decide whether if what im typing out is really how i feel or if its some expression of my need to write. I dont know. i dont know, i dont know
