My Everything

Goodbye

The Gate room is full with military and scientists alike. Everyone wanted to be there. Some knew him well, others just in passing, but all had a fond memory of him and his time in Atlantis. There were people with tears in their eyes and Rosalie wasn't the exception.

Standing at the bottom of the central stairs, she stands between Sheppard and McKay. Rosalie can hear Elizabeth's voice as she makes her speech, but her tear filled eyes don't leave the casket next to her.

She is going to miss him. She is going to miss the jokes, the playful smiles he would give her whenever he saw her, the times they would go off-world together, the times he would listen to her talking non-stop about some translation she had made, the questions he would ask about her work. She is going to miss him.

Rosalie watches as the casket is sent through the gate, saying a silent goodbye to her friend, as tears trail down her cheeks. She can't help but think how she wishes she could save everyone. Once the casket was through, people start to leave, but not Rosalie. She can't leave, not yet. She watches the gate shut down and it takes everything in her not to completely break down.

She feels someone squeezing her hand and when she looks over, she sees Sheppard standing there, asking her if she's okay. She's not. She wishes she had had more time. If anyone can understand that it's Sheppard. He says that he knows how she feels and that he is sorry that she has to go through all that.

Rosalie just nods, before leaving the Gate room. She knows he means well, but there's nothing he can say that will make it better. As she walks aimlessly through the corridors, looking for something she doesn't quite know what it is, he walks with her, telling her that he's there for her. She gives him a sad smile and thanks him as she hugs him, before walking away from him, wanting to be alone.

Eventually, she reaches the destination her feet lead her to and takes a seat, letting out a breath.

-"It was a beautiful ceremony. It looked as if everyone was there. And Elizabeth's speech was perfect. She definitely has a way with words." - She reaches out and squeezes Evan's hand. -"I spoke with Elizabeth and see says that she is thinking about sending you back to Earth, in the Daedalus. Just so you know, if that happens, I'm coming with you. I'm not leaving you."

Footsteps approach the bed and the curtain is pulled back to reveal Beckett.

-"Hello, love. How was the ceremony?"

-"Airman Nelson would be happy with the turnout. He touched a lot of people here."

-"It sounds it was lovely. Did you know the Airman well?"

-"We went on a few missions together and over time we became friends. He would always come by the lab just to see what I was working on, usually with a chocolate bar as a bribe so I would teach him some Ancient curse words. He was a good man." - Rosalie wipes some tears from her cheek, smiling at the memory.

-"I see. I'm sorry I couldn't do more for him."

-"You did what you could, Beckett. His injuries were just too extensive." - The man nods, sadly. - "Any news on Evan?"

-"I'm afraid not, love. Still all the same."

-"Right. Think I can have some time with him?"

-"Sure. Just let me know if you need anything, alright?"

-"Will do. Thanks, Beckett."

Beckett nods back at her before leaving her alone. Looking back at the man laying before her, she takes a deep breath.

-"I need you to wake up, Evan. Please. I can't do this without you. I can't lose you too. Please, don't leave me, not like this. I love you. I think I always have, but I was just too much of a coward to tell you. I need you back, Evan. So, please wake up. Please, I'm begging you. Don't leave me."

Rosalie breaks down, laying her head on the bed, not able to keep it in any longer. Tears stain the sheet that covers Evan and she wishes that he would wake up right now and tell her that everything is going to be alright.

Not only does she have the man she loves in a coma, but she also just lost one of her friends. She had known Airman Nelson for a while now, after that first mission with Evan's team to the "House of Prayers".

At first the young man had been a bit shy around her, knowing she was good friends with his C.O., but with time he relaxed and became more comfortable around her. She still remembers the first time he came to her lab, chocolate in hand as an offering, wanting to know more about her work. It turned out that he was interested in foreign languages.

It became sort of a routine for them. Whenever he would be in the city and had some time off, he would drop by the lab and sit with her as she translated some text, explaining to him at the same time. He was always so focused and she even saw him taking a few notes from time to time.

She learned some time later, that his time spent in the lab with her had really been fruitful when they stumbled across some Ancient ruins and he was able to figure out what they were, even with his minor understanding of the language.

When she found this out, she quickly congratulated him and she still remembers how red he had become at the praise. It had been absolutely adorable. She gave him a chocolate bar as his "prize" and that made him laugh.

Then, came the day when he walked up to her and asked her if she could teach him some Ancient cuss words. She had been surprised by the request and asked him why he wanted to learn that. His answer made her laugh.

He explained that he can cuss like a sailor, and that that is a bit frown upon, specially when out on the field and in the presence of his C.O., so he figured if he could learn some Ancient cuss words, he could get away with it.

Rosalie laughed, but agreed under the condition that he didn't tell Evan that she was the one to teach them to him. Otherwise, she would never hear the end of it. Nelson agreed quickly and they spent the next couple of hours learning new cuss words.

She is going to miss him, that's certain. He was a good man, funny, always ready to help those around him, he didn't care if you were military or a scientist, he would treat everyone the same, and that showed this morning when they had the memorial.

She is so emotionally exhausted that sleep quickly takes over. Hopefully by the time she wakes, things will be better, or, at the very least, be less awful, and there will be a sliver of hope, something she can hold on to.