You said you wouldn't

Chapter 37

HAPPY NEW YEAR LOVELIES!!

Sia's POV :

Bestfriend? 

Wait, Emily is Fay's bestfriend ?

Oh my god

Guilt filled me.

We are not only talking about a romantic relationship but a relationship between two siblings, two best friends, and a mother and her son.

I know that Justin will not damage his other relationships for me but they were still in a position of uncertainty of it at stake. For what? Me?

My ever-so-unconstant relationship with Justin? 

I felt so bad, helpless, and guilty.

" I didn't cheat on anyone Mom. I broke up with Emily earlier today. I know that does not make me sound any less horrible but I couldn't do anything else ma, I don't know what has happened to me but I can't seem to keep my emotions in check when it comes to her. " Justin exclaimed pointing towards me. 

And just like that, all the eyes were on me and I froze. I was in shock. No guy, Not even Andrew has ever been this bold with his moves when it came to me. That guy has refused to talk to my parents because he knew they didn't like him and he ...well let's just say wasn't used to facing criticism.

Fay stood up in shock, Justin and Aaron following her action, their eyes on Fay while hers on me as she gave me the death stare. 

"Fay I - "  I tried to come up with something to explain to her the situation between Justin and me possibly, But I was cut off almost immediately

"Shut up!" Fay yelled and angrily stumped towards me till she was right in my face

As Fay grabbed my arm, I was taken aback by her outburst. I stumbled back in surprise, looking at Aaron who gasped in shock, and Justin who was right beside Fay. He pulled her away from me, asking her to let it go for now and suggesting that we should all sit and talk. But Fay refused to back down. It was terrifying to see the hatred in her eyes, as I was used to her being friendly and sweet.

I had no idea that my crush on Justin would have so many consequences. But what was I thinking? I am here solely because his mom has such a kind heart and allowed a stranger to stay with me just because she felt bad for me. It may be charity, but I was still utterly grateful for her. God blessed me with such nice people after I lost everything I had and I decided to risk it all just because I couldn't deal with my hormones. What is wrong with me, seriously?

"  Fay...I am sorry. I - " I still tried to apologize reaching for her arm myself but Fay shrugged my hand off hers as if my touch burned her. I stumbled back some more which caused Justin to leave Fay and come to hold me in place.

" What is wrong with you ?! I told you it wasn't her fault" Justin asked Fay in shock who was now visibly more irritated because Justin was on my side.  Aaron held Fay by her shoulder in comfort

"Fay honey..come on it's enough for now. We'll talk later. Come, I'll get you some food" Aaron ensured Fay. 

Fay looked at me one last time before shaking her and then she said something that broke my heart completely.

" You are nothing but a home wrecher Sia. I wish my mom never found you "  and with that, she left 

" Fay!"  Both Justin and Aaron yelled in shock simultaneously but she was already out of the door

Aaron rushed to go after her but not before looking at me up and down and giving me a sad " Sia honey..."

I was numb. I don't know how this situation escalated so quickly and how a family was affected because of my stupid actions.

It's like whatever I do to make a situation right it ends up fucking it up some more. I was so guilty about everything that happened today. First Andrew showed up, then Alisha, and now Just- 

" Sia..I am so sorry. I should have told you bout this before and Fay about us All of this is my fault. I -" Justin soothed me but I couldn't let him talk me out of this guilt right now. I need to feel this and realize how badly I messed up.

" Justin...stop. Please. If anyone's at fault .. it's me. Surely" I whispered looking down, wiping a trail of tears that had escaped my eyes. 

"But - " He tried taking my hand in his but I stopped him 

"No. Just let me talk" I pleaded, releasing myself from his grip, taking a step back, and looking into his sad eyes with my teary ones

"I should have never imposed myself here. I don't belong here. I have taken advantage of Aaron's kindness, and even though I didn't mean to, I disturbed so many relationships."

 I took a deep breath, encouraging myself to say whatever I thought was necessary at that moment. I didn't want to regret anything later. So, I took a step towards him and rested my palm on Justin's shoulder. He noticed each movement of mine curiously.

" If I had maintained my distance, this " I gestured between him and I " must have never happened. I broke your and Emily's relationship. I broke Emily's home"

 A sob escaped my mouth ..Justin tried to comfort me but I regained my posture and continued, finally letting the words out of my mouth. 

"Fay is right, maybe I'm just a... " I sobbed even more, "maybe I'm just a home wrecker" and with that, all the strength drained out of my body and I fell to my knees, sobbing into my hands. I felt Justin's arms around me, comforting me, telling me I was being silly, that I was exaggerating, that it would be all right, that he would take care of everything.

I quickly became deaf to Justin's voice. I could sense that my heart had finally given up at this point. Perhaps I am just that unfortunate when it comes to love, and I won't try to make up for the things I've ruined. I forced myself to accept it, and my heart broke into a thousand pieces. No matter how much I wanted to think otherwise, it was true. I had become the person I had promised myself I would never be, and it horrified me to the core.

I was a homewrecker.

*****************************************************

Hello! I know I know ...3 whole months? Seriously. I know I've been horrible when it comes to consistency but guys...these 3 months were NOT what I was expecting.

I know you guys aren't interested in my life story and my justification, But I do not want all of you to think as if I don't care about this book or you guys okay? 

You guys are my everything.

So here's a list of what all happened in these 3 months:

* Had a breakup with my best friend of 8 years

* Prepared for entrance exams for masters but then decided to take a year drop

* Had 5th-semester final exams (30th Nov to 1st Jan)

* Got a boyfriend! yeah, he's the only good thing that happened. He's straight outta novel (just not the kind of what I'm writing. Treats me like the princess I am lol)

So, I was hoping you guys would bear with me as I struggle my way through college and get you the updates as soon as I can. 

Thank you so much for reading. 

Ilysm.

 Bye!