⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️ANXIETY, BODY DYSMORPHIA, SKIN PICKING ⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️
Y/N'S POV
A few days past since the camp out, Benny and I went back to normal. Well kinda, now if he's anywhere close to me he holds my hand, and is a lot more affectionate. Either he likes me back or he just wants to be near me, I'm fine with either.
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(CHANGE THE SHOES TO RED HIGH TOP CONVERSE YANKEES HAT TOO OBVIOUSLY)
Yeah-Yeah and Squints were getting the ball today, which honestly we shouldn't be playing at all. It's the hottest day of the summer. When Ham was just drinking a Coca Cola he almost passed out. For me my anxiety kinda kicks up in the heat a lot so this wasn't gonna end very well, if we didn't call off the game today. When I went in for a pop, the boys wouldn't share. Luckily for me, I packed water. It was ice cold but now it's mild. The boys stared with stars in their eyes with my water.
I sat down inside the dugout, terrible mistake but it's out of the sun. When my brother and Yeah-Yeah showed up, everyone complained to Benny and I. "Come on Benny I'm baking like a toasted cheeser it's so hot here!" Ham complained, his breath smelled horrible. Squints said it was too hot to play baseball, which he's not wrong. "Vote then. Anyone who wants to be a can't hack it, pantyhose who wears there mothers bra, raise you hand." Everyone but me raised their hands, i instead flipped him off.
"Fine, fine, fine! What should we do then?" Benny asked. Yeah-yeah started laughing and looking around. "SCAM POOL HONEYS!" The boys yelled. Translation, go to the pool. __________________________________
When I got home, I didn't feel too good. Lately my anxiety's been kicking into high gear. Part of the reason why I don't like going to the pool is I have to wear a bathing suit. I threw on a black bathing suit, it covered down to about the middle of my rib cage, the bottoms could make it look like a one piece or have it be more like shorts. I chose the shorts for today. Ontop I had a white T-shirt and jean shorts, I didn't even bother to take off my converse.
While I waited for Squints, I had this looming feeling. And so to cope I started picking at my skin. It's better than just breaking down or having intrusive thoughts. My hands started getting really red, like I had a disease or something. I heard a knock. "Y/n let's go!" Squints yelled. I shook my head, grabbed my bag and got my pool stuff ready. __________________________________ The rest of the boys didn't care about changing, they all dropped their shirts in a random locker while I took the time to set out my bag on an empty chair. I didn't go in immediately like everyone else did. I took off my shorts, and converse which wasn't the greatest decision. I started going into this head space where everything was dark and all I could hear was laughing, and people making fun of me. That reality was cut short when Benny, (still dry) came over.
