[DISCONTINUED] I Know The End, Regulus Black

𝐎𝟏𝟑. Sister, Sister

January 8th 1978

Lukas has known he likes men for a long time. Since before Hogwarts, even, so he's absolutely certain that he doesn't like women. Not everyone supports him, and it's not technically known around the school, but still. The important people know. A few boys he's kissed here and there know. He isn't ashamed of who he is. There's just the imminent threat of homophobes.

He understood the crush Raina had on James Potter, or the way Charlotte's mouth fell open at the sight of Sirius Black during their fourth year. He never understood Penelope, though. She seemed a lot less interested in staring at boys, opting to gush about how good Pandora Rosier looked, or how she was wondering if she could convince the Black family to let her get with Narcissa. Now, there's probably a term for liking women, but Penelope's never really come out with it and he knows it's wrong to assume.

Lately, though, his eyes have fallen on Evan Rosier. A bit of a rude guy, with a definite mean streak, but he can look past that. Belligerent, too. He's wrong for looking, wrong for even wanting a taste, because Evan's just like most of the Rosiers. He's not a hypocrite, because he knows that lately Charlotte's been wanting a taste of a Death Eater – unconfirmed, highly suspected – herself, and he's been warning her for that. So he won't even try to find out whether or not Evan's gay.

Evan can't be gay, at all. Every other party he's hanging around the arm of another girl who only has to twirl a finger around her hair to get Evan to flirt. To hookup. Lukas knows that it's a sign he needs to move on, but he can't. Some crushes are meant to be crushing, breaking your heart forevermore. He'll find that out the hard way, one day. Until his heart can't take it anymore to see the love of his life kissing someone worthy.

According to Charlotte, some guys are just into the whole talking thing. They want someone to be able to talk to them as an equal. Not as someone to search for a competition with. He wanted to laugh in her face, but refrained. She had a point. He doesn't talk as much as everyone else at Hogwarts. In fact, he rarely speaks unless he is with people he trusts. Or is drunk enough to forget the world. Maybe he's scaring people off because he's quiet and vengeful. No one can hurt a friend of his and get away with it, people know that. People fear that.

He envies his friends. Charlotte makes even the worst people look at her with adoration, or admiration. Penelope loves wild and open. Raina speaks her mind when she's not okay with something. He wants to know why he can't just do the same, why he can't be like his friends. He loves them, he loves them with his entire heart, but he's not like them. And he's certain he'll never be.

"Ah! Just the boy I was looking for." Albus Dumbledore approaches him. He's doing that a lot these days, Lukas has noticed. "Three of your older sisters are here to inquire about your summer plans. I told them I would bring you up."

Sisters. Lukas almost laughs, there is no way his sisters have come all the way from Germany. They hate him, he hates them. Easy. When the oldest sister moved out, the other four older than him were quick to follow. Only the youngest two are still living at home. Really, he doesn't even write them any letters to update them on his life. Why would he?