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— OUT OF LOVE. Lydia's pov.
CHRIS AND I SAT OUTSIDE OF MY APARTMENT the stairs made an uncomfortable seat but nothing could beat this uncomfortable silence. I pulled the sleeves of my sweater staring at the scenery in front of me. People from my apartment building coming back from their morning walks, random old people taking their dogs out, car's driving by. It was all so pretty to look at. Chris hasn't said anything since he arrived. I guess he was dreading this conversation as much as i was.
He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. What a coward. "I know." I speak up, he looks at me "I know you fell out of love..looking back at everything its so obvious. i almost laugh at myself for not seeing it earlier" I wipe the tears threatening my eyes. Chris's nose turns red from the cold "Im really sorry .. i just cant do this anymore.. i cant keep pretending im in love with you and i cant keep hurting you..You deserve so much better" Chris confessed. I saw this coming, so why was i crying?
My tears stained by light pink sweater, and i know Chris hated seeing me like this. "Its- okay..i get it. I just wished this wasn't you know one sided" I began.. "I wish i wasn't still in love with you."
Chris held my hand, and i held his back. We stayed like this for awhile. In absolute silence. Taking in that this was real and we really had broken up. It'd no longer be Chris&Lydia..From now on it would be just Chris and Just Lydia.
A part of me was scared , i didn't know the version of me that wasn't in love with Chris. what does after him look like? i was terrified to find out.
"You know i think Matt likes you" Chris nudges my arm and i smile "You think?" i laugh but i knew nothing could ever happen with Matt & I. Not as long as i was still love with Chris.
I turn to look at him , he'd already been staring at me "Thank you for being the perfect first boyfriend" I tell him as i bring the back of his hand to my lips. "I was lucky as hell to have been able to love you for three years..thank you for letting me be your first boyfriend" Chris smiles but then he starts to cry. I could tell this was scary for him as-well. "we'll be okay right?" I wonder and he nods "Always."
But that was a lie. I should've known it was a lie. Ex's are never okay. No matter how much love they have for each other, being friends with your ex is impossibly hard.
December 16th was the last time i ever saw Chris Sturniolo.
NOTES 📝🎀🌷🕊 ANDDD THATS A WRAPPPP. This is the official last chapter of this fanfic:)
i was gonna write an alternative ending with Lydia and Matt but it just felt unrealistic. I genuinely dont think Lydia would've dated Matt considering he'd be a constant reminder of Chris. BUT all ima say is they definitely shared a few kisses a year after her break up🙂
anyways to anyone who read this THANK U i know it was short asf but i promise i have many fanfics planned <3
my writing will also improve with time so pls be patient:)! TYYY FOR READING BABES
