𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐒 . poly!remus lupin , sirius black [ REWRITING ]

v. teenage hormones

˗ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄 ˗
❝ what are your ambitions, dominique? ❞

DOMINIQUE WAS FULLY AWARE of how she was perceived, and for the most part, she was grateful for it. It meant that people steered clear away and didn't bother her with things unless it was absolutely necessary. To most, it seemed as if she had very little emotion, as her face never said much. This was all very much intentional on her part.

However, she was still young. She had certain emotions and went through similar things just like any other person her age. She was still hormonal, and these things were beyond her control - although, she wishes they were within her control. She didn't like being attracted to Sirius Black, she never had. She loathed the guy, and every time he opened his mouth, she wished to take a pencil to her ears and burst her own eardrums. Perhaps that was going too far, but she did not like Sirius. Not his personality, anyway. He had annoyed and insulted her on far too many occasions for that to be possible. Which made the fact that he had a pleasant face even worse. She didn't believe he deserved to have such a pretty face, and it gave him an unfair advantage. She liked to blame her hormones on the fact that despite how much she despised him, she still found that his face nice to look at. It was all physical, not emotional.

Truthfully, the idea of relationships and even liking anyone terrified Dominique. It meant becoming vulnerable and that was one of the last things Dominique liked to be around anyone. And the idea of anyone being aware that she liked them or even found them attractive was equally as embarrassing for her. The thought alone made her cringe.

Nevertheless, just like with her other issue, she was a teenager with emotions she couldn't control. She did, even if she didn't want to ever admit it, feel slightly envious when she saw happy couples strutting about the castle. She sometimes felt that it would be nice to have someone who truly cared for her and loved her, but she would quickly shut down those thoughts, embarrassed to even let such a thing occupy her mind.

   "Good morning, Dominique," Remus greeted as Dominique walked up to their shared desk in potions on Friday morning. Nodding, Dominique dropped her bag by the table leg and sat down, brushing down her skirt after she did so.

   "Morning, Remus," Dominique responded, looking over at him briefly. Briefly. Kathryn's conversation in Charms earlier that week had left Dominique being more aware of Remus, and she didn't like that. "The golden retriever to your black cat." Dominique didn't need a "golden retriever", but she couldn't deny that Remus definitely was one.

A silence followed, Remus tapping his finger against the wooden desk as his eyes darted around the cover of his potions book. Advanced Potion-Making by Libatius Borage.

   "I heard we're going to be set an essay on the Elixir to Induce Euphoria - you know, what we went over during our study session," Remus suddenly began to talk, causing Dominique to flinch. "I- Sorry, didn't mean to make you jump."

   "It's alright. Just wasn't expecting you to start talking, that's all," Dominique shrugged, turning to him. Him and his big green eyes. He didn't maintain eye contact for long, returning his gaze to the seemingly fascinating front cover of the potions book.

   "I assume you understand it better now, since we went over it. But if you..." Remus cleared his throat, now picking at the corner of the already frayed book. "Nothing."

   "What is it, Remus?" Dominique frowned, her eyes catching Sirius' as he walked past their desk to get to his own. His left eye closed in a wink, to which she rolled her eyes.

Remus looked at her once more and then his book, as if wondering if he should stall long enough for Professor Slughorn to start the lesson, or if he should just say what he had intended to say. But judging by Dominique's progressively impatient expression, he figured he should just say it.