Kalopsia (Sequel to Monachopsis)

8 - he is in my tears

-Katsuki- 

He can't get away. No matter how much his body screams at him to leave, to run, and to never try and talk to this thing for the rest of his life, he can't. He doesn't know why. A strong feeling hidden under the fear, the feeling that if he turns away now, he won't ever get to have at least one piece of Deku that isn't tainted. 

Those green eyes are still his, those tears are his. Still, his fear continues to scream. His skin peeling back, the black depths hidden under the flesh that bring the sound of soft whispers with it, that isn't Deku. 

"Please, don't leave kacchan, please!" 

Deku sobs, green eyes beginning to get puffy and cheeks red. His eyes stand out even more. Katsuki looks down at Deku's hands, holding his own shaking ones, desperately trying to get him to stay. Small pearls of his blood dot the area around Deku's nails.

 He looks back at him, the pounding in his heart making his chest hurt. 

"I'm him in every single way! I promise I am Kacchan! I would never lie to you!" 

Katsuki can't look away from him. Deku has never cried this hard in front of him before, not ever since they were kids. The thought that he wouldn't ever see him again was shattered the moment he saw this version of him standing at his door.

 It was both terrifying and relieving, and like hell he's ever going to go through all of the bullshit of these past few days all over. He would rather have him with whatever fucking monster he comes with, if it just means he can see him smile again. 

"Deku,"

 The openings in his flesh look like water, rippling and begging to be let free. Green eyes are bloodshot, still full of tears as he looks at him hopefully. He looks like a shaking leaf, though Katsuki doubts he looks any better. 

"Quit it with the fucking crying." 

Katsuki lifts his other hand as Deku's eyes widen, his mouth slightly open. 

"Wha-" 

He wipes his tears away– a little aggressively– before walking, pulling him along. 

"Let's get back. The old man is probably making food by now." 

He doesn't turn back to look at his face, though he can practically feel his eyes staring at him in bewilderment. The wind brushes against his hand, making the small nail marks sting slightly. Deku sniffs and wipes his eyes, walking faster to get beside him. 

He gives him a wobbly smile, freckled cheeks bright red. 

"O-Okay kacchan." 

He can pretend. He knows Deku can too. They can just pretend that the last week didn't happen, that nothing was even wrong in the first place. Katsuki glances at the openings of his skin, and watches as flesh smoothly goes back to covering the black spots, seamlessly fitting together.

Deku looks just like he always has. He turns away and they keep walking. They both have nail marks on their hands by the time they get back to the house.