The Inheritance Games: Bad Things Happen To Everyone...

Pov: Jameson

i cant shake this feeling.
i cant give it a name, its just a feeling. the need for the thrill of an adventure. the need for taking risks.
the need for playing a game.
the need for winning.
the need to feel her lips on mine.
the need for avery to be with me. every, single step of the way.
the need for more.
i feel empty, like i need  to chase something.

theres something about roofs. its not just being high up and how it feels to go right up to the very edge. its seeing everything but being alone at the same time. its the way you can clear your head of those thoughts you never really wanted in the first place. its a way you. can feel nothing but everything all at once. its really a feeling like no other.

as i sit, alone in my thoughts, on the roof, drinking, shirtless, flipping the old knife open and closed, i hear someone open the trap door.
i dont turn around. i hate being seen like this. weak. fragile.

i feel a familiar presence lurking behind me. Heiress. she doesnt say a word, she just hangs back a little. that kills me. everything about her kills me in the best and the worst possible ways. "you can sit if you want." i say in a low, quiet voice. i close my eyes as she comes and sits by me. she feels so familiar, so comforting. so much like home. i love the way she leans in and settles herself beside me. the way her body fits so perfectly against mine. i feel a small smile forming on my face. i open my eyes and look down at her.

i stand up and turn around.
i have to be going crazy.

No.

No.

this is not happening.

this isnt real.

no..

this cant be real

can it..?

"i watched you die.." i hear myself say. my voice comes out in a shaky whisper. feelings i havnt felt in a long, long time suddenly resurface.

this is not real.

theres no way.

this isnt happening.

its all in your head, Jamie. breathe. shes not really here. shes dead.

Emily's dead.

"this is real. Jameson. im really here." her voice is painful to hear. "did you miss me?" she says in her playful manipulative way.

no no no no no.

"this is all in my head," i whisper to myself. "snap out of it Jameson."
"Jamie dont say that!" 'Jamie' breaks me even more. for reasons unknown even to me.

her voice is like a sirens song. so beautiful, yet so deadly. she plays with your mind and draws you in, only to kill you off soon after.

i cant fall into her traps.
not again.

"you can have all of this back," she says (gesturing to her body) in her sickly sweet honey voice. the one that convinces them all. "just give in. give in Jameson, and we can be together again. dont you want that? dont you want me?"
the smallest fraction of my heart wants me to do it. to say yes. but i cant. this is what breaks me the most. i cant do this to my brothers. to Avery. "no." i say. gaining back my courage. "i am not falling for this again. i dont care what we had. you had the same thing with so many more people. i watched you die.
this isnt real. its all in my head. ill never ever do this again. i already have someone. ive moved on. i have someone who really loves me. who changed me. who helps me, and everyone more than this ever will. ive moved on. its time you did too."
"who the special lady? hmm? your Heiress."

my legs fall out from under me. i feel the bottle of scotch break underneath the pressure of my hand. i feel a faint sting and see blood start pouring out like an open tap. i dont even feel anything. but i know its deep.

"h-how? how did you know?" im shaking now. im afraid now. how did she know? whats going to happen to avery..?

"oh her?" she says, "i know all about her. how she got it all. poor Gray, he probably couldnt cope, could he?"

it pains me how well she knows us. our family.

"its now or never, Jameson. make up your mind." she says to me.

i dont know. i dont know.

what do i do..?

i hear the small thud of the trap door in the distance. that tiny sound got registered into the far far back of my mind. im too wrapped up in my thoughts to realise that someone is there.

i stand up. blood still pouring from my hand. im still bleeding. i still dont feel a thing. im in shock.

i hear Emily's voice saying my name. i hear my name echoed again and again. shes standing right in front of me. she has me by the shoulders. "Emily.. stop. please. please Emily."

Jameson.

Jameson..

Jameson...

Jameson!

"get. out. of. my. HEAD!!" i shout. i shove her, hard. she gasps and grabs her chest in pain. she nearly stumbles but catches herself on the wall.

only...

Emily is gone.

the only person there..

is Avery....