Red & Black || Michael Jackson

four - vacancy

"Sorry, sir, but we're not looking to hire anybody at the moment. You can always leave us your details, and we can get in touch with you if a vacancy pops up."

Michael nods in response to the umpteenth rejection of the day from businesses in the local area. He knows finding a job isn't easy, but having visited various establishments for hours already, his hope is beginning to dwindle substantially. He grabs the notepad he has been carrying in his satchel, along with a black ballpoint pen, before opening the little book to jot down his contact information. He prays that his writing is legible as he rips the sheet from the notepad, and hands it to the woman at the counter.

Michael offers a disheartened smile. "Thank you for your time. Have a lovely afternoon."

With nothing else to say to her, he slogs out of the building, onto the next. He happens upon a quaint little cafe, but before he enters, he takes a glance inside through the large front window.

He sees a table occupied by two older women, delicately drinking tea and eating cake. They are clearly at a stage in life where they have no worries or responsibilities; most likely with adult children and their mortgages paid off, and the pension paying for the remaining bills and the odd luxury.

At another table he sees a young couple and their child — a sweet girl, no older than four or five years old like Casey — enjoying lunch together as a content little family. Michael can't help but fixate on the sight, jealousy subtly causing an aching in his heart at what he could have had, if things had gone better with Valerie.

He watches as the girl flits between nibbling at her tiny cheese sandwich, and sipping from the straw in her child-sized strawberry milkshake. She manages to spill a little down her dainty blouse, so her mother picks up a napkin, dabbing at the stain with a chuckle.

A doting mother. Why hadn't Casey been blessed with the same?

Michael blames himself, in part, for the way things went with the woman he believed to be the perfect mother to his child. They had both agreed that they wanted children very early on in their relationship, but he evaluates, in hindsight, that maybe he could have been less pushy about starting a family so soon after marriage. He hadn't forced her, of course, and she had been willing to take the next step to achieve the goal they'd hoped for.

Maybe she hadn't realised what she was getting herself into; maybe she had expected parenthood to be easier than it was.

The sleepless nights and the relentless crying must have proven too much for a new, young mother.

Michael realises that he is trying to make excuses for her unacceptable behaviour, so he mentally scolds himself.

Regardless of how much she had been struggling as a parent, she could have gone about it so much better than she had done by fleeing unannounced and leaving Casey unattended. She could have communicated her feelings and emphasised how much she was struggling to her husband. They could have worked it out together; made a plan together.

Just anything but this.

He finally pulls himself out of the spiral of thoughts he has landed himself in, deciding to push the door to the cafe open to enquire about any career opportunities they may have.

"Good afternoon, sir. What can I get you today?" the woman at the counter asks politely, preparing her notepad and pen to write his order.

Despite his nerves, Michael attempts to appear somewhat professional. "Uh, actually, I was wondering if there were any jobs goin' here at all?"

The woman smiles, weaving herself out from the small space behind the counter to walk Michael over to the notice board on the wall. She points to a flyer that has been pinned to the cork surface, before turning her attention to him.