Never Again

Chapter Six - How could you do it?

Whatever I was doing, he was always there. When I was hanging out with my friends, he was there, because we had too many mutual friends. I was going out for a drink and he would be at the bar. I was going out for a walk and his car would appear from somewhere, he would get out and walk along me.

I couldn't take it any longer. I stopped hanging out with friends, only going out with Dana. But even then, conversations about him would be constant.

One night, after having some drinks, I tried to fight it, but I gave up. I texted him and soon thereafter he showed up at the bar. We made out and then went back to his place. From then on, a really weird thing started happening. Everyone knew his official girlfriend was Anna, but also that his real relationship was with me. We didn't talk about her at all and I didn't care what he was doing with her. He was constantly telling me he loved me, but I didn't react in any way. He didn't stop.

There were those days when I called him and he didn't pick it up. Those days he would spend with her and I got used to it. We didn't hide ourselves. Even though we made public appearances together, I don't think she knew we were back to seeing each other. Most of his days were spent with me.

I was always telling him how good of a friend Dana was. At one point, he told me some strange things, like "Maybe she's not that good of a friend as you think."

Having the tendency to always trust him, a big mistake on my part, alarm bells rang into my head. I was never thinking straight around him, so I didn't immediately figure it out.

I noticed another strange thing. The background noise in his car sounded a certain way and I would always hear it while calling Dana. I couldn't just blame her based on that.

"Did you do something with Dana, Ray?"

He smiled at first, but then his smiled dropped off his face. "Yes, I did."

I threw my hands up. "I can't believe you. I got in terms with Anna, but now Dana? Am I supposed to call Anna and tell her you're cheating on us both?"

Even though it was meant to be a joke, he suddenly became serious. I didn't really care who he was sleeping with, it wasn't as if he had been faithful to me. But I had been faithful to him up until that point and it was soon to change. I was hurt at Dana, though. She played the innocent so good.

The next day, I called her, invited her out for coffee. She came and I played nice until she asked me how things with Ray were.

"Oh, I think you know, Dana."

She seemed surprised. "What do you mean?"

"Stop playing dumb. Ray told me about you two. I am not mad, but I only have one question. Why did you do it?"

She hesitated for a moment. "I wanted to know what you see in him."

I think I was more hurt by her answer than by the fact.

"You could have just asked me." I stood up. "I am not mad at you and I am still your friend. I just need some time."

With that, I left, not speaking to her for a few weeks.

At one point, I got bored of all that. I could understand his relationship with Anna and I started to feel for her. She was innocent in all this. But I couldn't comprehend his need to still sleep around. If two of us were not enough, then something was wrong with him.

And, through all this, he still told me he loved me. He still tried to make me feel good about myself. But it soon came to an end. Never again.

I continued seeing him, because no matter what he did, I couldn't stay away. My brain was screaming at me to let him go, but I couldn't.

Enter Martha. She knew I was seeing him and we had mutual friends, so we used to see each other now and then. I never really interacted with her, because I could tell she was a witch from the first time I saw her. She frightened other girls, always wanting to assert her dominance, always showing others she was the best. The truth was she wasn't. She was awful. She once put one of her friends' head into a public toilet just because her friend greeted Ray way too enthusiastically. Besides being incredibly beautiful, she had nothing.

I slowly became the target of her rage. At first, there were mumbled comments I ignored. Then, she started saying them louder so she could be sure I heard them. I am sure she was provoking me because she wanted a fight. She was then into another relationship, Ray had cut all the ties with her, but she was still bitter. I wanted nothing to do with her, not because I was afraid, but because I hated her. She didn't deserve the energy I would have to put into an argument or a fight. Slowly, though, she got to me and I complained to Ray about her.

We were on the road, on the way to another town and he started shouting in the car.

"I don't understand what she wants. You don't need to listen to her and, honestly, she just likes to talk. She can do nothing. Everyone is so scared of her that they take all of her shit but, trust me, if you start treating her the way she is treating you, she will back off."

I kept that in mind. I remembered what Layla told me that time.

"Is it true that you beat her?"

He wasn't taken aback by my question, because he knew the rumors she had spread about him. He replied calmly and I believed him.

"It's a long story. She went abroad and, in this time, I started noticing her way of talking changed. She would use those expressions that one of my good friends always used. I started believing they were involved with one another, but I couldn't just accuse her based on nothing. When she came back into the country, she admitted everything to me. She had been seeing him a long while before she even left. I tried breaking up with her. But her reaction made me even more angry. She jumped at me, kicking and screaming. I just pushed her off of me and she fell to the ground. Her back was bruised. She went to the police, hoping that they would believe her. Thankfully, her mother came to the station and told them she was a liar. She couldn't believe I had hit her and I got the chance to explain myself. That was the end of it."

I believed him. The way he narrated it seemed genuine.

I started fighting her off and, soon enough, she backed off. Ray had been right. She wasn't scary, she was just hurt and liked to make the people around her feel just as bad as she felt.

After this, me and Ray got closer. Maybe he then understood all of the things I had to go through in order to still see him.

Never again? Never again what? Never Again would I see him? I would see him a lot more, but things would get much more complicated. This time, not because of him, but because of me.