wonder | ATEEZ Wooyoung

18

The next week in class, I took two hours to get ready since I wanted to make sure I looked good for Wooyoung. I felt my heart race as I waited in the classroom, checking the door every two seconds to see if he'd enter. But, 15 minutes had passed and class had already started, and there were no signs of him anywhere. Well, besides the story he posted an hour ago.

I tried to look casual, but I truly was panicking on the inside. So, I swiped up on his story, asking him where he was. It seemed like a normal thing to be curious about, considering we had a paper due.

It took him about half an hour to respond, explaining that he asked for an extension already so he didn't feel like going.

"I thought we were going to pick things up where we left off?" I texted.

"I thought you were busy."

"I was busy last week, but I'm free today."

"How about next week then?"

"But, next week is our last class. Does that mean I won't see you again after we do it?"

"I mean, probably not. I'm graduating so," he replied. I felt my heart drop.

"So, this is just a one and done thing?"

"Yeah. Isn't that what we agreed on?"

"I thought we were friends though. Won't friends see each other again?"

"I'm not really looking for friends with benefits. I already had to cut all my other ones off."

Even friends with benefits was too much of a commitment for him?

"Then, what was that night between us?"

"We were just hanging out."

"So, that night didn't matter to you?"

"Not really."

"And I don't matter to you?"

"Not really besides you being a classmate and a friend."

I was in disbelief. His brutal honesty was once again getting to me. Only this time, it was the worst thing I could've imagined. The guy I like is telling me that I meant nothing to him.

"Clearly I'm not a friend if this is how you think of me."

"Are you trying to guilt trip me?"

"Excuse me? I was just asking for clarity."

"Then, what else do you need to know?"

"Why'd you take me out?"

"Because I thought we were just hanging out as friends."

"Yeah, well friends don't kiss each other like that."

"We've been planning on hooking up for a while. I didn't think it'd matter. And I thought that's all this was. A hookup."

"I never wanted it to be a hookup," I confessed.

"So what, you want to be friends with benefits? Is that it?"

No, I wanted more. But I knew I couldn't be too greedy. It wouldn't be right to force a relationship onto him.

"I just didn't want it to be a one time thing."

"Well, I do."

I felt my heart break with every text. Was I really reading too much into things? Was that night not as romantic as I thought it was?