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800 words
March 2023, Second Weekend of The Eras Tour
Taylor's sitting in her dressing room, head in her hands. Her phone is sitting next to her, anxiously awaiting the text that will either make or ruin her night. This is exactly what's played out before every single show so far.
Her phone buzzes, she sits up faster than she's ever sat up before, hoping it's what she wants. What she needs.
Joe❤️ liked "Show starts in an hour. Love you."
Her phone is launched across the room. Not caring if the screen cracks. Taylor slumps to the ground and begins to sob. Ugly, full body weeping.
This is the fourth time he's done this. She can't fucking take it anymore.
Some time passes, she's not entirely sure if it was a few seconds or several minutes. But there's a knock on the door. "Taylor? Is everything okay? I heard a crash and-" it's Melanie, one of her backups. Ultimately, Taylor's glad it's her, and not Tree.
The door creaks open, "Oh, honey.." she murmurs, sitting down next to Taylor, "Hey, c'mere," she wraps an arm around the distraught blonde, "Show starts in 45."
"I know," she hiccups, "Sorry. It's not very professional of me to be sobbing less than an hour before I go onstage."
"Shut up. It happens to the best of us," Melanie says, running her hand up and down Taylor's arm, "Tell me what's up, T. Did something happen? or are you just PMS-ing."
Taylor smiles a bit, "I'm on like military grade birth control right now, I physically cannot PMS"
"So something happened?"
Taylor takes a breath, "He barely even acknowledges me anymore. I pour my fucking heart out and all he sends me back is a goddamn thumbs up emoji."
"Tay..I think-" Taylor knows what Melanie is going to say before she even says it, causing her to burst into tears once more, shaking her head profusely.
"NO!" Taylor sobs, "No! I can't! I have plans! W-we-"
"I know, I know," Melanie sighs, "Let's have this conversation later, okay? We need to get ready." Taylor just nods.
Normally, Melanie wouldn't leave Taylor alone in a state like this. But they have a show to put on in 30 minutes. She really wants nothing more but to let Taylor cry it all out, but unfortunately, that's just not an option.
Taylor stares down at the ring on her left hand. Her make-up is fixed, she's in costume, and she has to take her ring off. That was the agreement they made, wear the ring in private, take it off in public. No matter what.
As she places it on the table next to the couch, she thinks to herself
Is this all worth it?
***
Taylor: Can I call you?
Joe: Not right now. I'm on set.
Taylor: Please? Margaret said you were on break I really need to talk to you
Joe: I'm busy, Taylor.
Taylor: Fine I'll call you later
***
Margaret: Is he not calling you back?
Taylor: Nope
Margaret: God I'm sorry I wish I could help I'll find him and talk to him I've got your back girl
Taylor: You're a lifesaver, thank you so much
Margaret: No problem T
Margaret: Bad news, babes You sitting down?
Taylor: That doesn't sound good Yes I am
Margaret: So I completely just walked in on Joe with..another girl
Taylor: No you did not. No you did fucking not Tell me you're playing with me
Margaret: I'm so so sorry
***
It takes her a moment to process the information that's just been dropped on her. But she knows that one moment she was in her living room, and the next she's in the bathroom, heaving up her dinner and what was probably her pulverized heart.
She couldn't breathe. Couldn't get the mental image of Joe with another girl. Kissing her, fucking her. Loving her.
She threw up again. Her head is spinning. This was is. This was the final blow.
She sits on the floor of the bathroom, head leaning on her knees, just taking deep breaths, trying to calm herself down, for half an hour. She knows what she has to do. Something she should've done ages ago. Her fingers go to fiddle with her ring, and something about it finally brings her to tears. She pulls it off, throwing it across the room, into the hallway.
It wasn't fucking worth it.
🩶🩶🩶
it's joever y'all the gays will return soon i promise just had to get some exposition out because taylor's about to have like fifteen identity crises so yeah the next one should out by xmas at the earliest but i will update before the end of the year 😋 vote, comment, don't ghost read love ya <3
