Trigger warning!!
Hey guys!! I wanted to take a moment to explain myself because I haven't posted in like 2 months.
My mental health has been not so great. A couple really crappy things have happened.
I got into a relationship with someone significantly older than me and found out she was dating two other people younger than me, and was currently getting expelled for assault allegations. Needless to say we broke up. She's been very obsessive since and will send me videos of her harming herself to try and get us together so I'm actually about to get a restraining order when she turns 18 which is in about 2 weeks. That experience sucked.
I also lost a very close friend of mine to an overdose. He was one of the best people I'v ever met and he had literally nothing. He would've given you the shirt off his back if you needed it. His parents were junkies and dealers and most likely supplied him with the drugs.
The hardest thing was that he died a month sober. He always said it was the hardest thing he's ever done. He was also gay which his parents were not okay with. He used to cry to me and tell me he was burning in hell and how much he hated himself. I miss him more than anything and I hope with all of me that wherever he is he's happy. Because he deserves it more than anyone.
All these events have been a lot and I relapsed pretty heavily in about October. I was admitted to the hospital on October 25 during a manic episode and I attempted suicide. After I had recovered physically I went to rehab and then residential treatment where I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. So I'm taking that in.
I've also come out to my family with my name and I can tell they don't approve much but they try.
My parents also very recently got divorced and my dad just moved out so it's pretty empty in here. He also has a bit of a substance abuse problem so I'm worried about him.
Anyway sorry to drone on and vent but I felt you guys deserved an update. I will continue the huskerdust book when I get a chance, likely soon.
Merry Christmas and Happy holidays
Love y'all
-Jack
YOU ARE READING
Ashtray -Angel Dust Angst
FanficThis is a huskerdust story!! Life in hell for a certain gay traumatized spider is somehow even worse than being alive. Between Val, being a porn star, dealing with his addictions, homophobia, and being forced by Charlie to work on himself, life is p...
