I am Jonathan Morgenstern.

Monster

(Listen to the song Monster by Imagine Dragons for this chapter. It's up above:)

Jonathan woke to the sounds of birds chirping outside his window he leapt out of bed and ran down the stairs. He sat at the kitchen table awaiting his father. He bit his lip in anticipation. His Father walked in a minute later slamming the door shut behind him. "Father!" He cried standing up and running to him. He didn't try to hug him, Jonathan knew his Father would not allow it under any circumstances. So he stood and waited. After a few minutes of silence his father spoke, "I will be going now Jonathan." He frowned, "but father you only just got here and it's Easter." His father glared at him, "I have somewhere more important to be." "Yeah, with him. With Jace." He got no reply just the cold air in his face as the door slammed shut and he was left all alone once more. He dragged his feet to the cupboard and scrambled up the shelves. He clung to the top shelf and managed to reach his cereal box. He sat down and ate it dry, staring and the vacant seat opposite him. Jace, of course it was Jace. Jace this and Jace that and he needs this and wants that. All about Jace. What about him? What about the true Jonathan? All alone. He didn't even have his own name. Who was he? Why did no one love him? Why did his mother leave him? So many questions and no one to answer them. Only the long and painful silence. He wanted friends. He wanted someone to understand him and to believe in him. But no. His father loved his fake son more than his real one. The scars on his back proved that much. He was a warrior just as his father had wanted, so why wasn't he good enough? He was everything his father had made him and trained him to be. He tried his best but his strongest efforts were never quite good enough. Not for father. Sometimes he dreamt of leaving and being part of the big wide world of Shadowhunters he knew were out there. Of living in the city of Idris. Of being accepted. But they were just dreams and this was the harsh cold reality. Everything seems beautiful from further away he mused, it's only when you go closer that you see the flaws and the cracks through the mask of beauty. That was what it felt like, a mask. He was slowly suffocating beneath the image of himself. He was crumbling underneath the cold eyed exterior. He was broken through the surface. He was a monster, he was sure of it. He pulled himself up off his bed and faced himself in the mirror. He looked himself in the eyes. No emotion lay there. No sympathy or compassion. He shivered at the sight. No Easter bunny, no Santa Claus, just him, a monster.

Hey guys...
I know I'm hardly ever updating anything because I don't really know what I'm doing. I'm just kinda going with the flow I guess. If you want me to keep writing I certainly will so please comment and let me know:) Thanks