Wounded Hearts

| Chapter 27: Sweet |

Lumipas ang taon na iniisip ko na baka hindi ko kayanin. Walang araw na hindi ko na-mi-miss ang kapatid ko. Araw-araw kong pinagdasal na sana ayos lang siya kung saan man siya ngayon.

I gave it a serious thought about what I should do with my life. I found purpose and hope. . . to continue living my life. . . even if sometimes, the trauma suddenly comes in my mind.

Napagtanto kong hindi naman pala ganoon karahas ang mundo sa 'kin. I still found another light amidst the darkness. . . at kahit ayaw kong aminin, hindi ko mapagkakaila na si Jairus 'yon. He was the one who contributed a lot to where I am right now. He helped me so much that I couldn't help but to always murmur my thanks in the air. He was the person who stayed by my side. . . kahit na totoong hindi naman talaga siya laging nandito sa mansyon dahil maraming inaasikaso, he never failed to check on me. . . he never failed to visit me just to celebrate special occasions together.

We celebrated our birthdays together. We celebrated Christmas and New Year together as well. Kahit simpleng selebrasyon ay sapat na sa 'kin.

Dahil sa kanya, nagkaroon ako ng pag-asa na matupad pa ang pangarap kong maging paglaki. Hindi naging madali ang mga una kong araw sa klase. Some bullied me and didn't understand my situation. Some mocked me for the status I was in. But I've been through hell that it didn't affect me that much.

Ngunit sa kabila noon, marami akong nalaman ukol sa buhay estudyante. I learned it from the university I was currently in. Na. . . hindi naman pala ako lang ang naghihirap. Many students were also struggling. . . many of them were crawling to work their asses of to sustain their needs in school and home. And I'm no different from them. We are all struggling. Magkakaiba man ang kwento.

I found new friends who became one of the reasons why my student life became bearable. They were there too. . . to help me fight every time I felt drain. . . burn out.

And my purpose. . . that's my family, my brother. What makes me wake up every day was for the hope that I'll meet my brother again.

Balang-araw, makikita ko rin ang kapatid ko. Makikinig sa mga kuwento niya, makita at titigan ang kanyang supladong mukha ngunit nagiging maamo pagdating sa 'kin. I can't wait to hear his voice. . . and to listen to his accomplishments. Hindi na ako makapaghintay na sabihin sa kanya kung gaano ko siya ipinagmamalaki.

"How are you?"

I heard Jairus' voice behind me. Nandito ako ngayon sa harap ng mansyon. Kakatapos ko lang magdilig ng mga halaman kaya tumambay muna ako saglit dito sa kanilang bakuran.

I heard his footsteps nearing. Umupo siya sa upuang kaharap ko. Nanatili naman ang mga mata ko sa harapan, sa mga halaman at bulaklak.

Sabado ngayon kaya walang pasok. I did all my homework last night so I could focus on my job. So far, hindi ako nahirapan sa pag-manage ng oras ko.

"Ayos lang," ngumiti ako.

I turned to look at him. He's wearing his formal attire. Itim na suit at necktie. Puting dress shirt naman ang suot niya sa loob. His brown wavy hair were well-made up. His brown hazel eyes met mine, it instantly made my smile grew more. Mukhang dumaan lang talaga rito saglit para kumustahin ako.

His brow shot up. "I'm free whole day tomorrow. Do you have plans for tomorrow?"

My heart skipped a bit. Bukod sa paghihirap na pinagdaanan ko. . . akala ko hindi ko rin makakayanang pigilan ang nararamdaman para sa kanya, sa bahaging aspeto na ito ng buhay ko.

I knew it. I knew that I fell for him. For the things he made me feel. For who he is. Akala ko hindi ko makakayanang itago 'yon. I'm just his housemaid and his. . . scholar. As much as possible, I want to keep it hidden. I want to keep it a secret. I was not the woman for him. I didn't want to go through that phase again, ang masaktan ng sobra. Ang magmakaawa para tanggapin ako ng mayaman niyang pamilya, gaya ng pagmamakaawa ko nina Tatay na tigilan na ang pambubogbog sa 'kin at tratuhin kaming dalawa ni Keith na mga anak nila.