Do I wanna know?

5.

top of the world,but im still not free

-the weeknd,jennie,lily-rose depp

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"What?!"

Both König and I yelled in sync as Shepherd told us the news.
"Don't worry...it sounds worse than it is..."
He tried to reassure us.
"No,this is the worst case scenario!200 recruits?!There is only us two!We both need to interview and see 200 people train in a week?" I said as I placed my hands on his table,frustrated.

König placed his hand on my arm but I just nudged it off.

"Colonel!"Shepherd yelled at me.I removed my fists from his table.
"I ask again,do you understand?"I clenched my teeth
"Yes,general."I muttered

"You are both dismissed.Expect them to arrive tomorrow.At least half of them."We both silently nodded and left his office

"che idiota!(what an idiot!)"i mumbled as we left his office.I was angry,there were too much people arriving at once.I started walking towards my office because I had to accept and print all of the recruits files...blah,blah,blah...

"Wow,didn't know you spoke italian?"König said from behind me.I jumped,I didnt realize he was behind me since I was lost in my thoughts.

"Jesus,you scared the shit out of me!"I whisper yelled "and yes,I was born in italy."I told him as I rolled my eyes and continued walking.

"Well,impressive."He said and I just remained silent.I was walking quite fast because I had a lot of work to do.I had to do 100 files and König had to do 100 files.

Once I reached my office,I turned around to König
"I have a lot of files to do until tomorrow,so do you.I recommend you to work."I said,my voice harsh and strict

"Got it,ma'am.See you around"He said,and he just turned around and left.What an asshole.
I just slammed my door and hopped onto my chair to do a ton of work I had left.

11:49 pm

It has been a long and an stressful day.I was working on those files from around 1 pm until now.

I just felt tired and numb,at this point I didnt even want to exist anymore,so I found myself on my way to the rooftop of the base.The roof where I have cried tons of tears whenever I felt tired and numb.

But today.

It was different.

I slowly made my way up the ladder to the roof and when I reached the top,i realized that the moon was full and there were tons of stars.

I walked over to the edge and sat down,my legs hanging as I gently swung them.I put my hand into my pocket to reach the cigarette that I had inside.

I pulled it out and placed it between my lips.I lit it up and inhaled it without exhaling.My thoughts were everywhere.About my past,about the work I had to do,about the military.About everything.Everything was so hard,I was so young,yet I had this hard job.

"Hey,mom...can you hear me?"I silently said while looking at the sky and the moon.
"It's so hard without you...I feel useless most of the times."I said as I took another puff of the cigarette.

"Amber and I are doing okay...she is still my little sister,don't worry..."I said as I felt tears well in my eyes,making my view appear smudgy.

"Why did you have to leave me..?You promised us you would return...now I need to do this crappy job!"I said as tears started falling down my cheeks.A sharp,but an very empty feeling in my stomach and chest.