CORRUPTED

𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘦 ✩ 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘶𝘥𝘦: 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯

letters unsent.
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dear [name],

it doesn't mean anything. right? all these feelings, these sleepless nights, everything. none of it really means anything. right?

no matter what i feel, no matter what i think. that's all i can do here. that's all i will do. think and feel. not act. not speak.

i'm scared, [n/n], honestly, i'm scared. i know if i say one wrong thing, the consequences will bear a heavier weight than any emotion i could ever feel. if i do anything to fill this hole in my heart, the result will be a crater in my life too big to fix.

the only thing standing between me and the fires of hell is the shield of my morals. YOU CANNOT PURSUE SOMEONE IF THEY HAVE A PARTNER. this belief has stood strong, like a great brick wall, and been unmoving and unbreaking in the face of adversity and a world where these types of things are ignored and forgotten about.

unfortunately for me,

the walls of the bunker that are my beliefs,

have started crumbling,

and i try desperately to fix them, to catch the falling stone and put the bricks back into place, and it works for a bit, until the walls fall farther into disrepair. so i keep on building them back up, and reinforcing them to be better and stronger,

but i think

soon enough

i'm going to run out of bricks.

all my love,

hoseok