Yeah so welcome back to another episode of “What the heck is going on in my brain?”
Staring ME! PJ!
Last time I was telling you my miracle, it was still a miracle, but now it’s a nightmare!
Oh let me tell the tale!
I followed Desmond on one of his missions and we ended up at his exes house in the US!
Found out her name is Mary Arameta Topez, like literally, the coolest and prettiest name I’ve ever heard! (Ugh!)
She’s gorgeous of course, and she looks like a model, and I think she might be older than me!
Insecurities aside, I am fully prepared to start her a Stan account right now, I wanna know EVERYTHING! Her fashion secrets, where she’s shops. How she gets her hair to shine like that? Her morning and night routines!? THE WHOLE BIOGRAPHY! I JUST KNOW! She would look so at home in a good sweater weather edit. *Heart eyes*
Also I noticed that Desmond looks at her from time to time with an expression I CANNOT understand and I’m really hoping this isn’t a Jolene situation.
But still. I Stan.
EH, Anyway, of course she has to have an even more gorgeous man as her boyfriend! With a totally weird name “Blanc Le Blanc.” So weird, right?
But he kind of resembles that guy from that Nicki Minaj song that my cousin was obsessed with and she kept playing the music video over and over again because she thought the guy was hot.
I thought he was hot too but I wouldn’t tell my cousin that, instead, I just laughed at his accent to annoy her, so I’m guessing this is my brains rendition of that guy, Lol.
But What then is the reason my brain did this?
Apparently The President of the United States is still Barack Obama, but not actually Barack Obama he is… different…
Yes, the rest of the details are now irrelevant, after finding out that for some reason, my brain made Barack Obama Gay! Now he has a whole entourage of male concubines trying to kill Desmond’s ex, the most coolest girl I’ve ever seen! Like literally THE epitome of Tumblr cool!
If I were a worldly person I’d probably name her the baddest female dog in the game.
(What is the game by the way? Does anyone know?)
“Poor Michelle.” I say, and I’m not talking about Williams!
How could he do this to the First Lady? So I spill out “But what about Michelle??”
“Who Michelle?” One of the village peoples say
“His wife! Michelle Obama?”
“Ooh girl you must mean me, MIGUEL, im Miguel, im his favorite ahehee.”
And he Actually looks like a male version of her mixed with my favorite R&B singer who kicked that girl in the face this year at some award show...
“Uhhh you wish!” Another one of them says.
Suddenly, Desmond grabs my shoulder, “His wife’s name is Jadah, not Michelle.”
Why is he so affectionate, touching my shoulder like that?
“JADAH!?” I scream, then cover my mouth.
“Ooh yeah honey that bih be runnin’ him, tho she don’t mind none, about us that is.”
“Yeah, cuz she got her own little set, the cankerous whore that she is…”
YOU ARE READING
Think YAHLAND: Alt 80s?
ParanormalA young adult, in wake of her busy life, decides to go back home for a breather. In her old room she finds her diary from 2013.
