Confusion || minsung

11

It was cold outside. With heavy breaths, Minho stomped his feet around the streets, holding onto Heesung's hand without knowing where to go. He had left the dorm on a whim and now he was starting to regret his decision.

Eventually, thanks to Heesung's calming words, they ended up sitting down on the bench of the nearest park, the closest one to where the students' residences all were. The blonde was trying his absolute best to slow down Minho's heartbeat, racing with anger still.

The ravenette fiddled with his fingers on his lap, gaze lost somewhere in front of him. "I went too hard on him." he whispered his thoughts out without even noticing. "I hated him so much."

"You resented him, Min. Because he broke your heart without even knowing it. It's okay to feel that way, but you both took it too far." Heesung held his boyfriend's hand and smiled at him, but the black haired never turned his head to meet his eyes, too lost in his feelings.

"He didn't have the right to get like that. He's done the same to me countless times and I've always kept my cool. I've never once blown out like he did." Minho furrowed his eyebrows, looking down at his lap.

Heesung sighed heavily. "I think he just likes you a lot and was having a bad day, so when he got jealous this time he just exploded."

Minho laughed bitterly, eyes back to staring at something in front of them. "He's the straightest guy I've ever met. He doesn't like me, not how I like him."

Then he processed his words and gasped, turning his head to find Heesung smiling at him. It was a sad grin, but one that said he'd known all along.

"Minho, it's okay. You've never looked at me the way you look at Jisung. Your eyes sparkle when you talk about him, and you smile so much brighter when it's for him. I've seen how you've tried to be like that with me instead, but you still love Jisung and that's okay. We can't decide where our hearts go, who they stay with."

The boy teared up and his gaze found his lap again. "I'm sorry." he whispered, guilty.

Heesung just wave his hand, brushing it off as if it was nothing. "Don't be. I'm okay with being your friend too. However, you should go back now that you've calmed down. You and Jisung have to talk things out."

Minho let out an airy chuckle. "Is this your way of breaking up with me?" he smiled, turning his head to his side to hide how he wiped off a tear that escaped.

He felt Heesung's hand on the side of his face, cleaning another stray salty droplet.

"I'm just letting you go to the one who really has your heart wrapped around his fingers."

"Jisung doesn't love me back." Minho tried to laugh, but it came out as a strained sob. Admitting it had always been hard in his head, but out loud was ten times worse. He discovered it that first time he told Chan and Changbin about his feelings.

"He does. Now go back to your boy and sort things out." Heesung's voice was encouraging, it had always been.

Minho nodded and stood up to walk back to his dorm, but turned around instead with fear behind his eyes. "What if he doesn't want to see me again?"

"He's waiting for you, I'm sure of it." the blonde smiled so reassuringly that Minho wanted to believe him.

He hugged Heesung hurriedly and started running towards his dorm, carving Jisung's presence, his voice, eyes, hair, hugs and smiles. The taller had been so right when he said Minho still loved that clumsy brunette boy. He had set a fire inside his ex-boyfriend, a need to tell the world and Jisung himself how much he really loved him, how desperately he had tried to forget about his chubby cheeks and bright laughter.