Blinded Love

Chapter Seventeen ~ Enigmatic Shadow

Chapter Seventeen ~ Enigmatic Shadow 

I closed my eyes, as I felt Baekhyun's gaze on me. I really want to put down everything, and hug him tight. My heart can only last for so long, I'm afraid I'll break down before he comes back to my side. I know he loves me, but seeing him with my sister makes me feel uneasy. I need to learn to trust him, and to understand his love is only for me. Someone's heart can change in a matter of seconds, or maybe years. This is where you have no saying in love. Maybe you might want to love someone forever, but forever isn't a vocabulary in your heart. I really want to love him right, like how others can love their soul mate. Someone can easily forget another, if they aren't around, that's why long distance relationship tends to not last. It's their existence that makes your everyday so important, but without them, there's really nothing much to love.
Maybe there could be people out there who can love someone they don't see so often, without getting tired of loving. I hope I'm one of those. I want to give you everlasting love Baekhyun. With you, I'm going through roller coasters, trying to understand what love is. I always thought I knew love, but when I realized I loved you, I didn't understand what it meant to let go, and let you free. I didn't get that phrase, where you let someone go, and if they come back, they were meant to be with you. Why would I ever let you go if I loved you? Even if we have problems, aren't we suppose to work together? Secretly, we are, but I don't understand why he has to date ChinHee. I trust that he loves me. I trust he won't fall in love with her, but him being with her, gives me that nasty feeling of sharing this and that. I really feel ashamed, because at times, I put my parents before you, sometimes you before them. You having ChinHee, is like me, loving another person, other than each other. I know, you grew up without your mom. I wonder how it's been with your dad, whom broke your mom's heart. I wonder if you ever blamed your dad.. I think you do, if you didn't you would have forgiven him, and you wouldn't have nightmares.

I grabbed Baekhyun's arms, as I still laid there with my eyes closed. "Do you love you dad?" I questioned him.
"No.. I don't. He's never done anything to deserve my love.." Baekhyun answered.
"I never done anything for you, you still love me.. but anyways, love him. And forgive him." I advised Baekhyun. "Do you know why I'm telling you this? Because if it wasn't him, you wouldn't be the Baekhyun you are. You wouldn't be the Baekhyun I love so much, neither would you be the Baekhyun who stays by my side for so long. Maybe you might, but because of your dad, I know you felt ashamed as a guy, you felt sorry for your mom. You didn't want to hurt anyone's heart the way your dad did. You did everything, and anything someone can do for a girl. That girl was me, you loved me right, you've went through so many crazy things for me, because you loved me. You didn't want to follow your dad's footsteps. Without your dad, there wouldn't have been the promise you made to yourself. The promise to not be your dad, and to treat your women right."

I sat up, and hugged him. Something like this is so hard to accept, and to love someone whom you blamed for so long. It's okay Baekhyun, what I've said might have went through your ears and out the other, but I'll always remind you of this, until you're able to accept your father. You say you love me, but without your dad, you wouldn't have even been alive to love me. Baekhyun, understand me.

"Are you trying to have an argument with me? I told you to go sleep.. you barely slept! What am I suppose to do if you go to the hospital? What would I do if you suddenly fainted?" Baekhyun raised his voice. "Please.. stop worrying about me, and worry about yourself. Once you get enough sleep, I'll go with you to find more details on your parents. Enough of my part okay.."

Baekhyun turned his back on me. I'm sorry Baekhyun, but I care for you. I love you, I worry for you. I hugged him, trying to say sorry, but he covered my mouth and looked at me. "You know what, let's forget these problems now. They're only going to make us argue back and forth. Let's stay as friends, and think of how to make ChinHee happy! You know how much I love her okay.. I don't want her to think we're only focusing on ourselves, and not her." He demanded.

I released my arms from Baekhyun, as he turned to face me. His index finger was on his lips. There's those time where he suddenly says something that breaks my heart, and I never know if it's true or not. Before he can explain, I already have a mini heart attack!

He removed his hands from my mouth and pointed at the bottom of my door. A shadow slowly disappeared as we stayed silent. My eyes widened, he's been seeing shadows every time we're in the same room. Who could it be? And why? Don't make even my own room prohibited for me to spend time with Baekhyun.

"Just go to sleep now, stop worrying. When you wake up, we'll think more about it, but with your condition right now, even if you have the energy to, I don't want you to overwork yourself. Sleep.. I won't leave you when you close your eyes." He mumbled.

I closed my eyes, trusting Baekhyun.
Slowly, everything fades into a milky way. I was sitting on a chair, surrounded with shadows everywhere. It was silent, and suddenly, Baekhyun appeared in front of me in hand cuffs. The shadow started laughing, with a creepy and evil voice. I ran to Baekhyun, hugged him with my arms, and cried. I kissed him on the cheeks, giving him comfort, and reminding him to be afraid of nothing. His hand cuffs disappeared, and his hands were all of a sudden free. The laughter stopped and the shadow disappeared.

I sat up, with tears in my eyes, as Baekhyun took my hands in his. He wiped my tears with his other hand. I pulled him, and leaned on his chest as he wrapped his arms around me. I'm really scared to fall asleep.. I don't know how to deal with these nightmares. Will they only go away if I find those murderers? I wish I could fall asleep in Baekhyun's arms, without worrying about anything, and just dream a sweet dream about the two of us traveling the world or something. What am I suppose to learn from these nightmares, they're driving me crazy!
I hugged him tighter and tighter, as I tried to forget everything. Just for this moment, I want to be brainwashed and fall asleep. I'm tired enough from waiting, I don't want to lose my sleep. Sleep should be my main source into seeing Baekhyun, while he's on his "mission". I'm really tired of sharing, I know sharing is caring, but I don't want to wait for my turn to hug him. I want to hug him whenever and wherever I want.

Baekhyun's eyes suddenly widened, as he pulled me away from his chest. He looked into my eyes. "I almost forgot to tell you.. do you remember the time we went to eat at the sushi place? Do you remember the dream you told me? The house! The bushes, half heart, black house.. do you? Your description fits your house. The house we're in right now!!" He whispered, as he looked back and forth from my eyes and the door.
I shook my head, there's no way it would be Ja, Seok, or ChinHee.. it can't be it. Maybe we're interpreting this dream wrong, but I've followed that shadow in the dream. The shadow.. it could be them.. but I don't see why.. no.. is this why I had dreams about my parents reminding me to forgive? Is it because it was someone whom I love, and whom I lived with for so long? It doesn't make sense.. no no.. I pushed Baekhyun away from me. I covered myself in my blankets. It just can't be! Maybe.. maybe someone else owned this house back then.. yea that's it. The old owner of this house.. there's no way it's Ja, Seok, nor ChinHee. As much as I dislike ChinHee for taking Baekhyun, I love her. I trust her.. It just can't be them!! 

...To Be Continued ~~~

Things just got serious!! Do you believe it's Ja, Seok, or ChinHee? Or do you think it could be someone else?