The family

Part 12

We're trying to heal.

(Pierre & James)

I woke up and James wasn't in bed, he must be with the baby, I got out of bed and put my robe on and went to the nursery, James wasn't in here only Liz and CJ, I said good morning to them, CJ said good morning, Poppy. I asked Liz where's James, she said she hasn't seen him this morning, I kissed the baby and walked out of the room, I went back to our room, maybe bae went for a run he's been leaving the house early in the morning. I called him and could hear ringing coming from baes closet, I walked in and it's James's phone, like I said maybe he just went for a run.

I got showered and dressed, I went back to the baby's room he's not in here, Liz must've taken him downstairs, on my way down I heard talking coming from CJ's room, he told Liz it's his baby to play with, Liz told him when he's older right now all he can do is eat and sleep.

I walked into the room, Liz told CJ to tell his daddy's it's time to take him to school, he left the room, I picked PJ up, Liz told me I should let him sleep he's fine, I sat in a chair and just smiled at my son, Liz left the room. Hey little man, thank God, he didn't take you, me and your other dad wouldn't know what to do if we lost both of you, you my son are not just a part of our world, you are our entire world, you are the best thing in our lives, yes, we have CJ and Manny and Jamie too, but you're special. I may have given you the gift of life, but you already gave me and your other dad another reason to keep going after losing your brother.

I love you with all my heart, and I know your other dad does too, CJ came back into the room and said he's going to school now, I hugged him and told him to have a great day and I'll see him when he comes back, he said bye to the baby and left the room.

 Jamie came into the room he said in spite of everything I have my son, I told him I do, and I should be thanking God for him, I asked him has he seen James, he said he saw him get in his car earlier and drove away. I told him that's odd he left his phone, Jamie said he has to get going, he rubbed PJ's cheeks and left, I wonder where James could be.

(James & Dyland)

I found myself at the cemetery again staring at my son's grave, we didn't even get a chance to really hold him, yes, we have PJ but why didn't Ross live too. I lost Cecil and now my baby, like I said maybe I'm being punished for the things I've done in my past, I felt a hand on my shoulder, I looked up and Dyland is standing there. I asked him what's he doing here?

(Dyland)

James, Pierre called me he's worried about you, something told me you'd be here, he said his son is dead, tears went down his face, because it hurts, I told him I know, sometimes I still think about mom and my dad and my crazy sis. I'm dealing with it, and I have EJ, and he has Pierre and his new son.

James backed away, he asked me what did Pierre say does he blame him for Ross's death, I asked him why would Pierre blame him, did they have words about that?

(James)

 Bro, no we didn't, but maybe this happened because of my past, and God is punishing me, Dyland said God wouldn't do that. Ross dying had nothing to do with me, it just happened, I asked Dyland how does this just happen, what kind of God takes an innocent baby away from his parents.

He told me fine blame God, he can take it but what I'm not going to do is blame myself, because if I do, I'll destroy everything I have, now be the best damn father I can to PJ, he needs me and so does Pierre. He's hurting too, Dyland walked away, I looked at Ross's grave and said daddy will always love him and I walked away.

I got in my car and drove home, when I got there, I asked Liz where's Pie she said upstairs, I ran upstairs Pie wasn't in our room, I went down to the baby's room and bae is there, he got out of the chair, and I hugged him. I told Pie I'm sorry for not thinking about how he's feeling. Bae said yes, he's hurt losing our son, but he's alright and now he knows that I'm hurting too, Dyland called him and told him where he found me, it's okay not to always be the strong one in this marriage, it's time he took care of me, like I do him.

Just like he'll take care of our other son's and CJ, he told me to look at him, I did bae said he's got me we're in this together. Pie said he can't say when or how, but it will get better, and we'll have each other, so don't blame myself for something we may never know why it happened.

I told Pie thanks I really need him, he let me go and walked over to the crib, he said, and he needs both of us to be a strong father and he knows I can do that because I've already done this before, because he's the one still learning.

I kissed bae and we watched our son sleeping so peacefully, Liz came in the room and told us we need to let the baby sleep, he'll be just fine, we left the room and walked down to our bedroom, I told Pie thanks again for loving me and making me feel better.

(Pierre)

Babe I'm going to always be here for you, and I need you to put some loving on me, we haven't made love or fucked since PJ came home, and a part of it is my fault because I slept in the room with the baby since he came home. James closed the door and started getting undressed, he said we need to do this while PJ is asleep, I started taking my clothes off too, and we fucked, bae said we'll make love later right now he wants to take care of me with what I need.

James fucked the shit out of me, and it felt so good I needed some dick, after we finished, we held each other. Bae said he feels better not because of the sex, just knowing one day we'll both be fine, I kissed him we heard PJ crying, I started to get up and we heard Liz say it's okay little man auntie will take care of him, his daddy's need a rest.

I laid back down and James held me, I told him I'll be okay too, God blessed us either way we have our son.

(Mother Hollens)

I finally got what I wanted.

I went to our house in Miami where my grandson is being kept, I'll name him after my father Chandler, the nanny said he's doing just fine, I stared at him, finally Falicia did something I can be proud of by giving me a grandchild.

 Chadwick senior is on his way here from London he'll love his grandson, he knows Falicia gave us a grandchild, and he agreed with me how I got him he said our sons are fucking women and not giving us a grandchild. And he'll be speaking to Chadwick about his lifestyle, if he wants to fuck men, that's his business, but he better get us a grandchild if the Alexanders can do it so can he.

 The baby looks like Falicia when she was a child, I'll love him even if he has Alexander blood, he's my grandchild.